Stirring Up Dust

A promise is a promise

2011-07-27T22:18:00.000+02:00

So, in my last post I promised to write about whoever was insane enough to read my ramblings and be my 3000th hit. I have been reminded by my awesome (and I'm not being sarcastic, she really is!) mother-in-law that I made this promise and Mr. 3000 is still waiting on his post. So here it goes....

I'd like you to meet my friend/relative/step-uncle-in-law, Tom. It's complicated. I could try to explain it all to you, but, like most families, trying to line it all out for you would just confuse you. All you really need to know is that Tom is cool. I'd post a picture, but for some reason I can't find one of him in all of my files. Perhaps it is because he suffers from the same disease I do. You know, that one we like to call stuckbehindthecameraitis. See, Tom is an avid photographer...and a good one. He took engagement pictures for Mr. Smartypants and I. I tried to talk him into taking our wedding pictures too. He was and is (as far as I know) smart enough to avoid taking pictures for Bridezilla.....did I mention he's smart? He's also an active member of his local Citizen's Police Academy. But the thing that always brings Tom, and his sweet wife Kathy, to mind is their love of dogs. Especially these dogs:

This is a Kerry Blue Terrier. And like many dog breeds today, these beautiful creatures are being bred in puppy mills all over the United States. Tom and Kathy, along with many other volunteers, work tirelessly to rescue these dogs and find them homes where they will be loved and properly taken care of. So, in honor of Tom, my 3000th hit, I want to bring attention to Kerry Blue Terriers and rescue efforts of this breed and others. To find out more about Kerry Blue Terriers, click here. To find about puppy mills, rescue efforts and how you can help all breeds, click here, or here, or here. I ask you to think twice before buying a dog. NEVER buy a dog from a pet store, and always do your homework if you're considering a breeder. My best advice and honest opinion? You should just adopt one through a rescue organization. They'll match you up with your perfect pet. One that will move into your house and your heart permanently.

People actually read this garbage??

2011-07-13T20:18:00.000+02:00

Right now, as I type this, my blog is dangerously close to 3000 hits. WHAAAAT? My little ol' blog, really? There are that many of you out there that have nothing better to do with your time than listen to some crazy woman who moved her four kids half way around the world?? You need a life as bad as I do. I could tell you to go get a life, but then who would listen to me wax ~~crazy~~ poetic. So as I chase Itchy and Scratchy up the stairs to the bathtub, I'm taking the time to stop and say "Thank You" to all of you who read this hot mess. I hope that you at least get a smile out of our day-to-day antics. I honor of the 3000th hit, if you are it, take a screen shot and email it to me. I'll drag you into this crazy mess by posting about it!

Adios

2011-07-12T20:04:00.001+02:00

Today marked a shift in the tides, a time of change, a day of new beginnings for Mr. Smartypants, and me, too. Today we said goodbye to a pair of good and faithful friends of my husband. I "inherited" these "friends" when I married Mr. Smartypants almost 6 years ago. I am not nearly as fond of these "friends" as Mr. Smartypants is. He loved his "friends". They were comfortable. They knew him well; he knew them well. I, on the other hand, had more of a love-hate relationship with them......

.

You may remember them from this post.

Today we said goodbye to these ~~horrendous~~ lovely things. Mr. Smartypants, always the practical, undramatic type, uncerimoniously walked into the living room, dropping them in the floor, and said, "I'm gonna have to throw these out. They're done."

"Really??" My head snapped up from the computer screen my eyeballs had been glued to. "Are you serious?"

"Yup, they're shot."

"Can I do it??? PLEASE?"

With a chuckle and a nod from Mr. Smartypants as he disappeared up the stairs, I snatched up the shoes and ran outside to the trash container, but not before I grabbed my camera to document this monumental occasion.

I'll refrain from showing you the inside of the trash can....there are just some things that one shouldn't share.

I considered humming Taps or something equally respectful, but since I was paying my respects alone, I figured why bother. I threw the dueces (that's flashing a peace sign with my fingers as a sign of my exit for those of you not in "the know") and walked inside. Goodbye, Ugly Shoes, Goodbye.

*UPDATE*

Mr. Smartypants informed me that the lovely shoes had been in his possession for 12 years, that would be 6 before me. NO wonder they were so nasty.

Stealin' a Peek

2011-05-04T20:38:00.000+02:00

Our new home in Germany is equipped with a kitchen window to die for:

And it just happens to overlook the neighborhood playground. While doing dishes this afternoon I glanced outside to see the most wonderful sight, a little girl and her daddy playing on the swings. But this wasn't just any little girl. You see, my next-door neighbor's husband (well, I guess technically he's my neighbor, too...but he wasn't here when I moved in so...well whatever..you get what I mean) had been deployed for the last 12 months. And he came home today. My neighbor has been a flurry of activity for the past couple of days as she has worked hard to make his homecoming special. And the little girl out my window, well...that was her 4-year-old daughter, swinging with her daddy...who just came home from war. So I picked up my coffee cup and watched out the window, hoping not to be noticed, but enjoying the sweetness of the moment. A princess and her knight in camo armor, swinging in the park. I don't have a picture of it, but I think taking a picture of it would have somehow stolen the intimacy of the moment for them. I felt bad (if only just a little bit) for even stealin' a peek. But I just couldn't help myself.

I am standing on the 50 yard line...

2011-05-02T23:02:00.001+02:00

It took almost ten years, but He. Is. Dead. Osama bin Laden met the same fate as so many of his victims. Like Mr. Smartypants likes to say: "Keep runnin'. You'll only die tired." Well, this weekend, bin Laden died tired. But the game isn't over. That wasn't the Hail Mary pass that won the game. It might be the touchdown that pushes us to a win, but there is still time on the clock. The enemy is still on the field. We can't celebrate yet. It's not over.
For the last 10 years, I have sat in the bleachers and watched the game. For the last six years, I have sat on the front row, right at the 50 yard line. It has been a nail-biter, I promise. Every newscast is carefully listened to in our house. Every move our government makes affects us. My husband is in the game and he doesn't sit on the bench. There have been men down on the field that won't be rejoining the game. Their teammates won't forget about them and play all that much harder in their absence. There have been touchdowns: the fall of Baghdad at the beginning of Operation Iraqi Freedom, the fall of the Taliban. There have been times we thought we might have blown it: Abu Graib, the Korangal Valley. But here we are, still in the game, still fighting to win.
Many Americans watch from the comfort of their living rooms, content to be a Monday morning quarterback. Some come and sit in the stands to watch because the players on the field make it personal for them. Still others of us stand on the sideline right at the 50 yard line where it's almost too close for comfort. But we do it, because for us, the game is personal. That uniform out there, well, under it is the man we love. So we beg of you, just because we scored another touchdown, doesn't mean the game is over. Don't pack up your bleacher cushions, or get up from your armchairs. It's always the last part of the game that your team needs the most support. Don't forget that the game isn't over. They still need to hear you cheer. I'll be cheering. Join me. I'm the one standing on the 50 yard line....

Unaccompanied Minors

2011-04-27T08:24:00.001+02:00

This is what happens when mommy leaves a camera within ~~hoof's reach~~ arm's reach of any member of the Herd.

Banana anyone?

Arm chair aerobics

Glad to know the lectures on how crack kills have worked.

This little piggy went to market...this little piggy stayed home....this little piggy stole mommy's camera....

We love our AFN tv!

Poser

More of "This little piggy"

Proof that mom really is a prison warden.

Noodle's homework

A super-spy shot of Mom.

Really, they even had proof that I was doing something else...I was in the kitchen, cooking!!

Yup, it was the Ugly Cry

2011-04-26T23:10:00.001+02:00

As a military wife, I'm often asked, "How do you do it?" Most days my response is "How do I not do it?" Meaning simply that I don't feel it is a choice to do what I do every day. This is my life: deployments, seperations, weird work hours, extra dirty (and often extra smelly) laundry...all the things that come with being an Army wife. In the words of a popular athletic apparel line, I "just do it". Because I don't have an alternative. Because the alternative would be to Not do it. And that just isn't good enough for me. Mr. Smartypants jokes that he tried to warn me, that he tried to convince me to run the other way (he really did, on day three, but that's another story). I like to put on my "tough Army wife" face when people ask me that. Like it's no big deal. Like they just asked me how I tied my shoes this morning. But the reality is that it's hard. Some days I fight to put one foot in front of the other. So for all of you who have asked or want to ask, how I do it, how we do it....this post is for you.

I would like to introduce you to the bane of the existance of my inner fashionista. A.k.a. Mr. Smartypants' favorite pair of sandals. Now, he has newer and nicer sandals that he wears at times (specifically when I give him "the look" or when he thinks ahead and knows that if he comes down in these things he'll get "the look"...and don't pretend you don't have one that your better half gets from time to time, all wives have one), but these are his favorites. They rank up there with the (seriously) worn out Red Sox hoodie that is quite literally falling apart. But I didn't put this picture in this post so I could pick on Mr. Smartypants. The significance of this picture is not the shoes or their state of ~~destruction~~ wear. The significance in this picture is actually the time it was taken, about 2000 hours, or 8pm for you civilian types. On a normal night, these would be on his feet. But see, that's not going to happen tonight, because he's not here. He's off training up his soldiers so that they can live up to the old Army motto of "be the best you can be".
It is a fact of military life that they must go off for training. We certainly wouldn't want to send our soldiers to war without it. But it means that even though our soldiers aren't deployed (or "down range" as we often like to say), they are seperated from us. Generally it isn't months, just weeks, but seperation is seperation, especially when our time together is so limited. And so his favorite sandals sit empty and unworn in our bedroom for now. And tonight, seeing them there, without the feet that have worn them down, makes me a little sad, and a little lonely. (It probably didn't help that I have been surfing the internet, reading some blogs of other military wives. They often bring a tear to my eye.)

So I'll grab another piece of chocolate (thank you Easter bunny, please don't tell my kids), finish off the last drops of Dr. Pepper, curse myself for not making that shoppette run earlier to get more and tell you how I really do it.
1. I eat chocolate...lots of it...it makes me feel good. I don't eat other things to counteract the caloric intake from the chocolate...usually dinner is the first to go. But I eat chocolate, lest my butt decide to shrink *gasp, the horror!!*
2. I drink Dr. Pepper by the gallon *please see point 1 for application of point 2
3. I stay up late and make blog posts...it gives me something to do when I ~~suffer from insomnia~~ let out my inner nightowl.

I had the joy of having coffee with several wives from our company today. Many of them have never survived a deployment before. It made me think about all the ways we react to seperation. Some of us fall apart, some of us feel so out of control that we micro-manage the parts of our lives we can control. Some of us eat. Some of us don't eat. Some of us lay on the couch for 12 months. Some of us live at the gym, using the treadmill as our personal stress reliever. Whatever we do, we each find a way to cope the best way we each know how. Some of us miss our soldiers at night, when the bed is empty; some of us miss him in the morning when he doesn't come home to change after PT. But we all miss our soldier. Don't let our tough exterior fool you.

We are a resourceful bunch, using the things (or chocolate stashes) around us to cope. We live on our computers, our iphones and facebook. Hoping that maybe, just maybe, he'll have time to call. Technology is our friend, and our worst enemy. We wait. It's hard, but we do it.

Then, there are our children....I can't even begin to explain the impact seperation has on our kids...well, I could, but this military spouse blogger does a much better job. Please don't ignore this link. I beg you to go read it. It made me cry, you know, the blubbery, nose-running, snot-flying UGLY cry. And I don't ugly cry because...well...it's ugly.

So the next time you ask a military wife, "How do you do it?" Just nod and smile when she answers casually, but know deep down, it's hard work.

Off to the Races!!!

2011-04-26T16:03:00.000+02:00

So I finally braved the Autobahn this past weekend. I must brag on myself and let you know just how well I did. If you aren't impressed with my driving on a freeway as a 33 year-old American, let me share some information with you.

THERE IS NO SPEED LIMIT

That's right. This is not a myth, but fact. On most open sections that are non-urban areas on the autobahn there is no speed limit. That means your nuts-o brother-in-law's uncle's cousin with the turbo-charged, nitro-infused, NASCAR wanna-be sports car can drive as fast as he would like (assuming he ships said car to Germany and gets an international or US forces in Europe driver's license). This also means that Germans grow up cruising this limitless fulfillment of the need for speed. I, however, grew up and learned to drive in the good ol' USA where there are speed limits everywhere...even the middle of nowhere West Texas. So the idea of this kind of speed, in a MINIVAN no less, is a little daunting. Smartypant's frequent caution about the dangers, snares and perils of the autobahn while he drives us around hasn't done a whole lot to boost my confidence. Finally, after driving around locally for a couple of weeks now, I decided I was brave enough to give it a shot.
I probably shouldn't have waited so long. Getting the van over 35mph was toe-tingling enough at first because it's been a month since I have driven a vehicle at normal US highway speeds. We were headed to another military base to do some shopping and were travelling caravan style with another family. Now our friend doesn't drive slow...in fact, he'll run off and leave you if you don't keep up. He started out behind me but soon passed me and later complained that he couldn't take one more minute of following me because I failed to use my cruise control. Whatever. Anyway, I managed to get up to a good speed (somewhere around 85mph) and topped out on the way home at 95mph (although I chose not to maintain that speed). Now this sounds pretty fast, but let me assure you that I was regularly passed by small cars that could pass for rollerskates.

(Yes, that is one of those Smart Cars; yes, Germans seem to love them. Might have something to do with the minature parking garages)

At one point I was passed by an Audi that was going so fast that the Herd-mobile shook and I felt like I was standing still. He was easily, EASILY driving upwards of 130mph. Not only was he driving that fast, but dude was changing lanes! If you think it is impossible to get up to that speed on a somewhat busy highway or wonder why he would bother changing lanes, let me share some rules of the road here:
Never drive in the left lane. It is for passing only. This is not a suggestion. The locals will ever-so-kindly let you know with a *ahem* polite honk of the horn that you need to move over. The left lane is used for passing. Period. End of story. So this means there is lots of lane changing going on. So with the high speeds, changing lanes can be tricky. The driver must be constantly aware of all cars on the road, even ones far behind you. When you put your blinker on and start to change lanes, it is not enough to check your blind spot, because dude in the Audi may be 500 yards back, but he's moving at close to twice your speed. Stay where you are. Once he's done trying to single-handedly blow you off the road, you can pass safely.

Of course, going that fast has it's consequences. Most insurance companies will not pay if you have an accident going over a certain speed deemed "safe" (somewhere around 130 or 140 kilometers per hour, I think). And, the faster you go the more horrific the carnage if you wreck. So with all the freedom found on the autobahn, My lead foot and I are quite comfortable with our 80-85 mph mark. I think I'll let Mr. Audi have his speed thrills and I'll sit back and enjoy the ride.

*all photos courtesy of that awesome thing called the internet*

Calling it Home

2011-04-17T11:26:00.001+02:00

So now we have a new place to call home.

Okay, so maybe this isn't the exact address we call home, but I can claim it as a neighbor....sort of. Well, I'm not even sure it's in the same zipcode I'm in, but it's close enough that we loaded up the kids after school one day, visited, looked around and were home for dinner. That counts as a neighbor, right?

So The Herd has stampeded it's way into Germany, stirring up as much dust as possible in our wake. The Army encourages us to "blend in" as much as possible....which we all (meaning military families living overseas) laugh at hysterically. Even without an Army uniform, we stick out like sore thumbs. My sweet Scratchy tries to blend in even adding the neccessary scarf to complete the look:

Too bad that all the locals stop and stare and point at her neon red hair. She can be quite the spectical walking in the market.

Itchy, on the other hand, is just herself...she's too busy to be concerned with what others think and that probably makes her blend in the best.

The boys have adjusted well, stretching their airplane-cramped legs in their new environment.

There isn't much that has slowed us down. We're adjusting to the new environment. New people, new sounds, new sights, new smells, and new tastes. It is sensory overload from time to time, but we manage. When we first arrived it was exhausting. A couple of hours in the market downtown left me drained, mentally, physically, emotionally. But now it's not so hard. I use my handful of German words and the locals are kind enough to help me learn a new one or two and use their (pretty extensive) English for me. I can buy carrots and potatoes from the market with no help now! Ein kilo karroten, bitte! (One kilo of carrots, please--although I'm not sure my German spelling is as high speed as my German speaking!) Not bad for 3 1/2 weeks. Scratchy and I even ventured downtown on the bus by ourselves to buy produce yesterday. She loves riding the bus. It allows her to people watch and see the city from a slightly different view. I like riding the bus because it means I don't have to park the Herd-mobile in the (tiny) parking garages downtown. I am legal to drive in Germany, as I passed the driving test. I occassionally drive over to the S family's house (they live off-post) and I drive around on our post but I have yet to brave the parking garages or the autoban....both make me a little nervous. We have friends here that drive a Suburban. Yes, the giant tank of a vehicle can be driven over here, but they don't take it into parking garages (it wouldn't clear the overhead clearance rail anyway) but they park it (parallel, no less) on the street. So I'm sure one day I will take the Herd-mobile into town and live to tell about it. Let's just hope our insurance company doesn't drop us after a few claims from scraping the van up on the concrete walls in the garages...

The first adventure was not so fun...

2010-12-30T16:09:00.001+01:00

in fact it was quite scary. We had made what seemed like our 100th trip to the mall. As we were leaving we passed one of those bungee cord/trampoline jumper things that are often found at the mall parting parents with their money. Some kid was on it doing back flips so we stopped for a moment to watch. We gathered the kids, headed toward the door then stopped to put on our coats. I put scratchy's coat on first then turned to deal with other children. They were all standing right around us. Once my husband and I got everyone's coats on we walked out the door. Half way to the parking lot, almost simoltaneously, we realized that Scratchy wasn't with us. We turned around and my husband ran inside to get her, thinking she just wasn't looking when we walked out the door and was probably standing there looking around, scared. When my husband didn't come back quickly, then returned empty-handed, I felt my heart drop. I could feel the panic creeping up inside me. We started looking for her and another older couple stopped what they were doing to help us look for her. With in minutes, while we were looking, some nice woman, another mother, came out the door carrying her. I cried and thanked her and hugged my baby. The other woman reported that Scratchy had been very scared, but very brave. My husband carried her all the way to the car. I can assure you that was not the way I had envisioned our adventure beginning and certainly is not something I want to repeat. I'm just glad God protected her, sent someone nice to help her and she was returned to us safe and sound.

And so it begins

2010-12-28T19:20:00.001+01:00

This adventure we're on....relocating from one place to another, with stops in between. Seperations, craziness, living from suitcases for long periods of time, this is our life for now. These are the things we do to get from A to B. We are now officially "in transition". Living with my parents for an undetermined amount of time may seem nuts to some and perfectly natural to others. As for me, the jury is still out. I'll let you know in a few months if it was a great move or the most insane thing I've ever done. I have decided that this furlow in Texas will be and time of adventure for my kids and me. I will be trying my hand at homeschooling. I'm not sure how that will work, but we're about to find out. I plan to drag the kids to as many museums and such as possible while we're here. As for right now, I'm headed to a birthday lunch for my mother-in-law.

So after a long break.....

2010-11-21T04:20:00.000+01:00

Okay, so I've done a really crappy job of blogging as of late. I know, I know. I should do better. And I want to, really I do. I see women who blog daily and have thousands of loyal followers and I dream that I will never be that...I like my privacy too much. But I do like the thought of people actually being interested in what I say. I've tried a dozen different things to make my blog interesting, but I have decided that none of those things, by themselves, are really worth writing about (and therefore reading about) everyday so I will not follow a formula of having a subject that I blog about, and instead will blog about what I feel like blogging about on any particular day...whether it be my faith, my family, my kitchen, my shopping habits or my craft room. I might even blog about blogs...I do follow some good ones. Regardless, I will blog as I see fit about whatever is in my brain at that moment...it is my blog after all, so I can pretty much do whatever I want, right? If you don't like it, you don't have to read it. It's a free country, no one is forcing you to read this disaster. Feel free to find a new web page to look at. With that said, because this is a free country, I will say whatever I want whenever I want because it is MY blog. If you disagree, I encourage you to start your OWN blog and gripe about me all you want. I have the freedom not to read that. Just as I have the freedom to delete comments left here that I don't like. Just sayin'. It's my blog and I'll delete if I want to. Not that any of my two loyal readers would ever leave a disparaging comment, but just in case someone stumbles onto my blog and decides they don't like me...I have covered my ground (and my rear-end). Now that I have officially stomped my soap-box into oblivion, I will go on with my other-wise boring life and share some sort-of boring things with you. The holidays are coming up...all too fast in my opinion...it's already almost Thanksgiving and I am nowhere near prepared for it. This year may well be the year I am the turkey. Less you think less of me, I must inform you that I have started a menu in my head for dinner (it has to do with food, people, you had to know I would have thought of THAT if nothing else). Our best friends in the universe are coming for the holiday and she is as good a cook as I am...so we should all gain a hefty 10 lbs. (Here's hoping we burn most of it just to keep the weight off) So here's the menu (so far, I'm sure it will change a hundred times):

Thanksgiving with The Herd:

Deep fried turkey (seriously, we're southern...did you expect something else?)
Mashed potatoes
Bobby Flay's brussel sprouts
corn on the cob ('cause I'm creative like that)
green bean casserole
pink fluff
fruit salad
some kind of sweet potato...although the jury is still out on how to prepare them
cornbread dressing (stuffing is for Yankees)
buttermilk pie
pecan pie\
chocolate pie
coconut pie (yes, we do indeed like pie, why do you ask?)

As we get closer to the big day, I might share my recipes with you....if I feel up to it. Until then, dream of deep fried giant turkey drumsticks and plot your course of leftover actions....

Thoughts on Moving....again

2010-09-22T21:56:00.000+02:00

I sat down to clean out the ~~pigsty~~ office today 1.) because it really needed it and 2.) because we're going to be moving in a few months and I know how that tends to sneak up on me. I figure getting organized now was my best course of action. I want this move to go smoothly but I would also like to get at my computer without breaking my neck. As I purged myself of my cluttering sin, I began to think about the up coming move. So much is still in the air. What size house/apartment will we get? Will there be room enough for all our stuff? Will we even get to go with Mr. Smartypants or will we get stuck here for weeks or months while he goes and we wait for housing? Will I survive a 9 hour plane ride with 4 children? Will my 4 children survive the 9 hour plane ride? PCS moves are always hard on anyone. But when you have to do them every 2 years and there are so many unanswered questions with each move, it can wear a woman down. Today is one of those days. I absolutely dread the thought of moving. I know, I know...everyone in the world is jealous of my next location. My most faithful Christian Army wife sisters struggle to not covet my next assignment. But today, just today, I might be willing to trade places with them. Ask me to trade tomorrow....not gonna happen. But maybe, just for today, I would like to stay where I am.

Something New!

2010-09-13T19:40:00.002+02:00

Star Spangled Bags is proud to announce we are now offering accessories for the little princesses in your life, too! Tutus have arrived! That's right. We're now offering custom tutus starting at $15. Single color tutus (like the one pictured) are $15. Two colored tutus are only $18 and Three or more colors are only $20. These can be made to fit any little girl. We offer infant sizes also. They are $12, $15, and $18. Tutus are great for holiday pictures or other special occasions as well as great for dress up. They come with either an elastic waist or an adjustable waist.

Keep your eyes peeled for a special deal from Star Spangled Bags and Markers and Mud, coming soon!

This week's grocery trip....

2010-09-02T03:38:00.000+02:00

Okay, so I was shooting for $100 a week to run my household, basically. If I were just looking at the next two weeks I would have totally blown it, but I'm a big picture thinker, so I haven't blown it yet. It will be the middle of the month shopping trip that will determine that. This trip's total ran $340. Still not bad considering I bought lots of stuff that should last a lot longer than two weeks...like pink syrup for my kids' milk (please see previous post if you think this is a luxury item...I promise, it is not.) and a tank of vegetable oil. I also had to buy a new Swiffer Wet Jet as Mr. Smartypants got a little carried away cleaning my floors for me and broke the handle on my old one...not that I'm complaining. He mops. 'Nuf said. I bought almost $30 worth of diapers. Moose will be the only 14 month old that I know that is potty trained if the diapers don't go back on sale at Walgreens soon. All in all, it adds up rather quickly. So we'll see how I end up at the end of the month. I'm gonna keep a tally of all my trips to the store (even just for milk) and see what my total is at the end of the month. That should be a better indicator of my actual average. So for the fun part....What I Learned At The Grocery Store This Time...

1. Never ask your husband if there is anything he would like for you to pick up for him. He ends up listing expensive, border-line healthy, "diet" type frozen foods and canned soup. Next time I will forget to ask, taking stock of his razor stash myself.

2. Clip all the coupons, even if you don't feel like it. I totally got lazy and only clipped enough for exactly what I would buy. Then I realized I could have used different ones instead and would have done better. Laziness is my enemy.

3. Stick to the list.....focus focus focus focus focus. Hot wing flavored Pringles are not on my list...but they are in my pantry. (For the record, they are totally yummy)

4. DO NOT talk to your mother about your little brother's upcoming wedding on your cell phone while in the junk food aisle. For that matter, don't talk to your mother while you're in the grocery store at all. Again, focus focus focus focus.

5. Just because your boys like plain Cheerios, does not mean you have to buy them even when they aren't on sale. It's okay to omit things from the list as you shop...just don't add.

6. Don't have dogs that are picky eaters. They're more expensive than picky children.

7. Bulk meat is only a good deal if the unit price is actually better. READ THOSE LABELS. Price per pound people, price per pound. I found most of the "family size value packs" were the same price as the smaller packs. Exception....ground beef.

8. Watch the checker scan your stuff...make sure it rings up right. I was over charged 30 cents per dozen on my eggs. Doesn't seem like a lot until you add up how many dozen I bought. 6...cost me almost $2 in over-charges, just on the eggs. If you can't watch the checker, check your receipt. Again....focus, focus, focus, focus, focus.

I shouldn't have to go back to the store for much this time. Milk, of course, because we go through a gallon a day in my house. My fridge won't hold two weeks' worth. I would need my own walk-in cooler. Hmmm....that gives me an idea....focus focus focus.

$100 a week....Part 2

2010-08-31T20:20:00.000+02:00

Okay, so its grocery day again and I and determined to get our budget to about $100 per week. Last time I didn't do so bad but there was the follow up with three more trips to the store for random things like eggs (who knew being so budget-wise would mean 7 dozen eggs...and no that's not a typo. 7 S-E-V-E-N. Six people consumed (in various forms) 7 dozen eggs. That's an egg a day per person if you're counting. And we didn't eat eggs for breakfast every morning either. Focus, Haley, focus. Focus focus focus focus. My grocery shopping...yes... Anyway, today is grocery day and my list is looking suspiciously long. I ran out of a lot of stuff over the course of the last two weeks. I will be replenishing random things like pink syrup for the kids' milk (yes, I realize that is a luxury item/non-necessity in most homes, but you don't know the twins...there will be rioting). I guess really the point is to average $100 per week, right? Okay, so off I go with my list, my coupons, and my plan. I'll check in later and let you know how it goes and what I learned this week.

Like Waves on an Ocean

2010-08-21T04:19:00.000+02:00

Have you ever noticed how when it rains, it pours? Seems like everything in life works that way. Right now it's raining bags at my house. If you want to see what I've been up to, check out my other website. I've got several bags I'm working on now and a couple of possible orders coming my way. I'll be posting pictures over there as I finish bags.

Killer Deal

2010-08-19T15:00:00.010+02:00

I managed a killer deal at the commissary yesterday. Combining a "found sale" and coupons I knew I had at home, I was able to get two kinds of cereal for 49 cents and 24 cents a box. That's one sweet deal.

I stopped by the commissary a few days ago for milk and walked past the "good deal" area of the store. In two shopping baskets, right there in front of me were two things I knew my family would go nuts for. Wheaties Fuel cereal and Kellogg's Toy Story 3 cereal each for 99 cents. The store had 50cents of coupons for the Wheaties on a tear pad attached to the cart, which got me thinking....I probably had coupons for the Kellogg's cereal as well. I decided to wait and check my coupon stash at home. Boy am I glad I did. I not only found a $1 off 2 Kellogg's cereals for the Toy Story 3, but I also found a 75 cents off 1 Wheaties making the Toy Story cereal 49 cents a box and the Wheaties 24 cents a box. I walked out with 12 boxes of cereal for a little over $5 (we get charged a small surcharge because there is no mark up to cover overhead at the commissary). Can't beat that with a stick.

Do you have an awesome "found" sale? What good deals have you stumbled on lately?

What I'm Reading Wednesday

2010-08-18T21:52:00.001+02:00

Well, folks, it's that time of week again. We're gonna take a peak and see what's on my bookshelf this week. Last week, if you'll recall, I was reading sales ads and coupons. This week is a different story. With the twins in preschool and as such napping in the afternoons due to school induced exhaustion and Noodle back in school, finally I have time to do a little for me. Not much, mind you, but a little. So I am actually able to read...some....when I hide in the bathroom...
Anyway, I am reading and I am ready to share the good, the bad and the ugly with all of you. This week I'm reading Walking with the Women of the Bible by Elizabeth George. This is actually a devotional book, but I'm reading it like it's a regular book. This is a perfect combination for me because it is broken up into short chunks, as it is a devotional book, but the content of the chunks is good stuff. There is lots of background information as well as insightful thoughts about women who appear in the Bible. Even better, the author goes in order from Eve (of Adam and Eve fame) all the way through to the book of Hebrews, focusing anywhere from a page to several pages on each woman. Some of the women we know well, like Eve, Sarah, Mary (mother of Jesus) and sisters Mary and Martha; others, we know very little about, not even their names like the bent woman in Luke 13:10-17. It's the first book I've come across that has such an exhaustive compilation of women in the Bible. You can check it out for yourself...I'm gonna go read a little more before naptime is over.

Back to School....well, To School anyway...

2010-08-17T21:57:00.002+02:00

It's ~~back to~~ go to school time here at the home of the Herd. Itchy and Scratchy started preschool today. They go four days a week, half days. When Noodle started school 4 years ago, I was 35 wks pregnant with the twins. Of course, I cried when I dropped him off, I was hormonal, right? Today I had no such excuse. Just like with Noodle, I made it to the door as I was leaving and started tearing up. Mr. Smartypants started laughing at me (just like he did four years ago). "They're just going to school...you'll see them in three hours" Glad he can reason himself into a calm state. I did, for the record, only shed a few tears. By the time I got to the car, I was fine, and in total control of my emotions. The twins, well, they barely managed a wave in my direction as I left them at the door to their classrooms...

Shopping Trip Recap

2010-08-13T20:16:00.003+02:00

Okay, so I said earlier this week that as part of operation Penny Pincher I would grocery shop with only cash and....

I chickened out. I just wasn't brave enough to go to the grocery store with out my debit card, so I took it, but I made it a point to avoid impulse buys of ANY KIND, and I did. I only added a handful of items to my list as I remembered being low on things while cruising the aisles. I PROMISE the things I added to my list were all things that are requirements to culinary function in my house, namely, ketchup.

Have you ever noticed that some companies call it Ketchup, and some call it Catsup? Anyone have an answer as to why? Just wondering...

Sorry, random thought, (focus, focus, focus). Like I was saying, I managed to (for the most part) stick to my list. I used only a handful of coupons and managed to come out great, I think. At least, better than usual. Two weeks worth of groceries, paper goods, and of course, gourmet dog food for 6 people and 2 dogs is a lot of stuff. A large WalMart sized cart FULL. I managed to get out the door for $185.87 total. Including the $5 tip for my baggers. I do most of my shopping at the military Commissary and the baggers there do not get paid. They work only for tips. Since it is always part of my grocery shopping trip, I included it in my final price.

Proof of my trip:

The lady bagging my groceries today was impressed that I could feed six people for two weeks on that. It breaks down like this: $16 per person per week or a little over $2 a day per person. When I break it down like that I want to run up and down the cul-de-sac, waving my receipt, singing 'We Are The Champions" at the top of my lungs. But the neighbors already think I'm weird enough, no need to confirm their fears.

I did shop at Walgreens this week for a few household items (I'll go over that shopping trip in a future post) so my total did go over $200 for two weeks and we'll still have to buy milk between now and my next big trip. Even still, I think I did a bang up job this week. My ultimate goal is to get my total shopping below $100/week for everything. Slowly, I'm getting there. I figure I'm gonna attempt to potty train Moose as soon as he shows any signs of being ready. Being diaper free will help the overall grocery bill too.

A few things I did or noticed while I shopped today:

I watched unit prices to get the best overall price. I read that horrible tiny small print on the price labels on the shelf, or I busted out the calculator on my phone and figured it myself. This takes a little more time, but, because package size can vary from one vendor to another, it means I'm getting the most for my dollar, not just buying the cheapest one on the shelf. Sometimes I did buy the least expensive, sometimes I didn't because the least expensive was also the smallest.

I realized that even things that look the same size are actually not and things that look like they are larger than their buddies on the shelf are actually not. Take the juice for example...The large Juicy Juice container looked bigger on the shelf than the Mott's juice container but when I looked at the actual size of the products, the ounces were the same. The Juicy Juice was only about 5 cents more expensive, and if I hadn't read the label I would have assumed that the Juicy Juice was larger, making it the better buy, but it really wasn't. It is important not to just look at the package to see which one looks bigger, but to actually read the label and figure out the unit price to ensure you get the best deal. Cereal is another place you need to do this. Our store carries 4 different boxes of Cheerios. And the unit price varies from one box to the next.

I passed on some good deals that would have cost me more money in the long run. In trying to not spend much money and avoiding impulse buys, I passed up somethings that I might have normally fallen for. Our store had the Axe men's shower gel gift sets (1 reg. size Axe, 2 travel sizes and a scrubbie)on sale for 5.99. I had a coupon for $1.50 off the set which would have made it 4.49. That's actually a good price for what was there, but I held off to see what was in the soap aisle and ended up getting a better deal on a different brand. And my guys didn't need a scrubbie, their's are in good shape right now.

I need to clean out my pantry BEFORE I go shopping next time. I have made a habit of cleaning out my fridge before I go to the store. It makes it easier to know what I have and make room for all the new stuff I buy. I am now gonna have to start doing the same thing with my pantry. After I got home and cleaned it out, I realized there were three things I bought, that I did not need. Namely, ketchup. I knew the bottle in the fridge was low so I bought more...then I found a bottle hiding in the pantry.

While I was shopping, I kept a tally of what I was spending. And I really liked the way I did it...it worked well for me. My shopping list is divided into sections much like my grocery store. I have non-grocery (all my personal items as well as cleaners and paper goods), pantry (dry goods), deli (which isn't really deli, but it's the aisle where packaged lunch meat, bacon and sausage is found...hey, my list, my names), freezer (self-explanatory), dairy (again, duh), meat, and produce. As I grabbed something, I wrote down the price (rounded up to the dollar)next to the item on my list. When I finished a section, I totaled it up. This way I could see a running total of what I was spending. It was also interesting to see which sections grabbed the majority of my budget. Keeping track of what you spend, regardless of how you choose to do it, really does help keep you on track. After seeing my subtotal for non-grocery, it was easy to avoid buy extra in pantry which is where I tend to find extra stuff to buy. By the last section (produce) I was so excited that I had done so well that I wanted to keep doing well and not blow it. It kept my momentum up.

This trip was a huge success. I'm still not sure I'm confident enough to go Cash-only but I'll get there soon, I'm sure.

What tricks do you use to keep your grocery bill down?

$

What I'm Reading Wednesday

2010-08-11T21:11:00.002+02:00

Okay, so I'm a book worm and love to read so I thought a weekly peek into what I'm reading would be kinda cool. I read some really random stuff sometimes and run across an unusual book that is really good that I think everyone should read. So here's my opportunity to share it with you. I hope that you will join along and post a comment with what you're reading at the moment as well. Let us all know if its worth us reading, too.

This week, being the first appearance of this and all, I had high hopes of putting some fabulous book on here that actually improved my IQ (unlike the preschool TV that I usually watch that I SWEAR causes me to LOOSE IQ points). However, I have four children, three of whom are preparing for school (i.e. Mom is preparing them for school) so I haven't had time to read much. Here is what I'm reading today:

Yup, you're seeing correctly. That would be back to school ads and coupons. How exciting, right? What have you been reading this week?

Moose turns 1

2010-08-11T05:30:00.002+02:00

Okay, so he turned one over a month ago, and it's been forever since I posted pictures, but here are a few for you to look at. My Moose is getting so big. But he's still Mama's boy.

Awesome Deal Alert!!!!!!!!

2010-08-11T05:25:00.000+02:00

It's clearance time at WalMart again!!! Grranimals are on sale now at my local WM. I got girls toddler size boot cut knit pants and a pair of legging capris for $1 each. I also got toddler boys short sleeve striped Tshirts for $2. Check your local WM for sale prices. It's time to stock up.
*If you don't have children that wear big infant or toddler sizes, I'm really sorry. This is a heck of a deal. I'll be checking stock at multiple WMs. Be careful, though. Some of the stuff at my WM was marked down incorrectly. For the least amount of hassle, find one of those scan thingies on the pole. Check the prices ahead of time and you won't have to get a headache arguing with the checker!

Walgreens this week

2010-08-10T20:56:00.003+02:00

As part of Operation: Penny Pincher I promised to use a variety of the most popular money saving methods out there and report back on my results. By far, one of the most popular strategies is to stack coupons with sales, rewards programs and rebates. Women all over the internet report savings of 80-90% sometimes. The gals over at The Krazy Coupon Lady utilize this theory to save tons of money on everything from toothpaste to kitty litter. This method works best if you have a multitude of stores to choose from, but I live in central Missouri and frankly, there just isn't squat around here except for Wal Mart. According to many couponers, WalMart is the devil...or at least related to him. I'll admit, I don't do very well going to WalMart with my coupons in tow. I tend to do better at Walgreens with my coupons, which is why I occasionally make the 25 mile drive to Walgreens in the next town. Of course, I typically combine it with other business I have over that direction. I will be going to get my son from his dad at our halfway meeting point tomorrow so I'll swing by Walgreens while I'm over that direction. Other weeks I combine it with a trip to the fabric store.

I have been trying this theory for some time myself and have had mixed results. Shoppers who are not fans of this method complain that it is too time consuming and complicated, with too much room for error. I would agree, except I have occasionally made out like a bandit. So, for the sake of my experiment I will continue to try it and see if I can get consistent results.

The key to this method is planning ahead. Being extra nice to the check-out clerk will get you farther, too. I sat down with the Walgreen's ad for this week (available online if you didn't get Sunday's paper) and my stack of coupons. I have also learned to not buy everything just because it is a great deal. Even buying something at a 75% savings is a waste if it isn't something you need. And frankly, as an Army family, stock-piling isn't really much of an option. We either don't have room or are moving soon.

**couponing alert** It does take some time to get enough coupons to be beneficial in this system. Start slow, you can buy a Sunday paper and then go to The Krazy Coupon Lady website to print some internet coupons. They have a list of internet coupons you can print from your computer.

Walgreens uses a customer reward program called Register Rewards. It's pretty simple. Buy a product featured as having a RR attached to it and a coupon for a specific dollar amount will print with your receipt. You do have to pay full price (or sale price) up front, but the coupons are typically pretty good. The best deals come when you use a Manufacturer coupon on the item then get a RR. Example from my shopping last week: Gillette Proglide razors were on sale for 9.98 with a $5 RR. I had a coupon from the paper for $4 off one razor. I bought one razor, used my coupon and paid 5.98. I then got a $5 RR good for a future purchase at Walgreens. The gals over at The Krazy Coupon Lady do a really good job of explaining coupon policies of most major chains.

So on my list this week for Walgreens:

Arrid Extra Dry 99 cents ea. (limit 3) with in-ad coupon
deodorant for my hubby (this is the only brand he'll use so I have to stock up when I catch it on sale)

1 Schick Hydro Razor 7.99 - $5.00 coupon (from Sunday's paper) = 2.99
1 Schick Hydro Shave gel 1.99 - 1.00 coupon (also from paper) = .99

purchase a Schick hydro razor and receive $2.00 register reward

total expense for hubby's 3 deodorants, razor and shave gel = 6.95 and a $2 RR
I have $3 in RR from last week in my wallet so my out of pocket expense will be $3.95 and I'll be getting back $2 in RR. Not bad.

Walgreen's is also having a sale, RR promo on Venus razors, but I think I can actually do better at my commissary on those items so I'm gonna hold out.

The good about Walgreen's is that you can use a Walgreen coupon and a manufacturer coupon on the same item essentially doubling your savings. Walgreen's puts out a monthly coupon book, in this month's book they have a coupon for Listerine. I have manufacturer coupons for Listerine as well so I'll be able to use both of them.
The kicker with multiple coupons is that your total number of items purchased must equal or exceed the total number of coupons. So, I couldn't buy one bottle of Listerine and use two coupons. Too many coupons, not enough items. In order to make the transaction work, I have to add a "filler" item to my purchase. Lots of people buy a small pack of gum or something like that. I try to avoid buying something I don't need and instead try to stack my purchases with something that is simply on sale that I need. *warning* using register rewards to pay for your purchase counts as coupons.
Since each item in my purchase has a coupon, in order to use my RR to pay for my purchase, I will need to add 3 more items (I have 3 $1 RR). This is where some shoppers would get tripped up (I have made high dollar mistakes here before). By planning carefully now, I will avoid tripping up at the store. I also still need some school supplies for my kids. Walgreen's has great prices on school supplies, often beating Wal Mart by a landslide. I will be adding the following school supplies to my shopping list as well. These items are on sale and do not require any coupons:
Elmer's Glue sticks (2pk)-19 cents
Loose leaf wide rule paper-49 cents *I will be purchasing 2 of these*
I've added the three items I needed for my kids and to be able to use my RR from last week and only added another $1.17 bringing my total out of pocket expense for the trip to 5.12 + tax and I will receive a $2 RR.

Let's recap
3 deodorants
1 razor
1 shave cream
1 pk of glue sticks
2 pks of loose leaf paper
total: $5.12 plus I walk out with $2 in RR in my wallet.

And I will be carrying cash...$10 to be exact...no debit cards this time.

not bad....not bad at all.

There are tons of other great promos in this week's Walgreen's ad, but since this is my experiment and not my attempt at saving YOU money, I am only going to highlight the deals I'll be using.

Operation: Penny Pincher

2010-08-09T16:33:00.002+02:00

Okay, so we all know the economy is crappy. There's really no nice word for it, but there are plenty of not-so-nice ones. Even though I personally don't have to worry about our next paycheck (at least not yet), I'm still raising 4 kids on one (not so big) salary. I gave up my career climbing the corporate ladder in retail in early 2006 when Mr. Smartypants and I discovered we were expecting. Good thing. A week after I quit, we found out we were having twins...and no one wants to pay that daycare bill....I promise. Well, four years later and one more baby, we are still living on one income. And plan to continue to do that until further notice (i.e. they all go to school and I get bored...ya right). Being a Stay At Home Mom (known further as SAHM) has its advantages: my laundry stays done *smirk*, my house stays clean *snort*, and I always have time to cook warm, wholesome meals for my family *choke*. But the most important advantage is that I get to hang with my kids all day. Hey, preschoolers can have some deep conversations (Mom, why is Dora's dress purple?) Regardless of our reasons for my lack of paying work (I work, trust me, I just don't get the lovely paycheck at the end of the week...Mr. Smartypants would have to win the lottery to afford my paycheck anyway), we are living on one income. So I feel my job is to stretch that income as far as humanly possible. This is the way I can "add" to the family bank account. If we can live well on as little as possible, then there is more money at the end of the month to do whatever with. So what does this novel of wandering thought mean? I'm trying hard(er) to save money and I'm taking you along for the ride.
This mission we're on is a journey through all the money saving techniques and tricks we can find. My ulitmate goal: find the best way to save the most money while feeding my family yummy, nutritious, healthy meals. I will be posting often about this with daily and weekly missions to save money. I would love for you to try these ideas yourself and let me know whether or not they work for you. Some people swear by coupons and national chain drugstores, others, Wal-Mart, still others, warehouse clubs. I will be trying several different popular techniques and reporting my results and my opinion.

This week's mission: PAY ONLY WITH CASH

I don't mean avoid using my credit card. If you're using your credit card to pay for groceries you either a.) need to see a financial planner and a credit counselor or b.) have your finances in such good order that you need not participate in this...just keep using your card, paying it off at the end of the month and collecting those frequent flyer miles....oh, and send me a postcard from which ever cool place you go to with those miles.

What I mean is I'm going to use COLD HARD CASH...you know that green paper stuff we used to get in birthday cards from Grandma, before she started sending us Paypal payments for our birthday.

This is the theory...if you go to the store with only your budgeted amount in your purse, you are less likely to spend extra money on impulse buys like 8-2 liters of Dr.Pepper just because you found them for 35 cents each because you don't have to security of your bank account balance to fall back on if you go over "just a little bit".

My pre-shopping opinion of this:
This could work beautifully or this could backfire seriously. My concerns: Making sure what's on my list won't exceed my budget before I ever go. The time consumption involved with keeping a running tally of my spending while in the store shopping.

My goal: Pay only in cash, come in $10 less than budget, treat myself to starbucks with the leftover cash.

My shopping day this week is Thursday morning and I will have only Moose with me. Itchy and Scratchy start preschool this week (wooo-hooo, party at my place!!!) I'll report back Thursday afternoon/evening with the results.

What do you think about this?

So It's Been A While

2010-08-08T15:31:00.002+02:00

Okay, so it's been a while since I've actually put anything on here. I've decided to make a come-back...just in time for Social Security recipient, Brett Favre to attempt another season in the NFL. I have intentions of putting something on here almost daily...I have pent-up SAHM angst to be rid of. What? You didn't know a SAHM had angst? Just take typical teenage angst, add dirty diapers, crayons on walls and 8500 loads of laundry. That is SAHM angst. So prepare yourself. There is much in store. Including some (somewhat) regular appearances of "What I'm Reading" and a money-saving/frugal living/tightwad (depending on how you choose to look at it) section. I also promise to share what we're having for dinner...unless its fish sticks or frozen pizza...can't have any of you believing that I feed the Herd anything other than perfect, home cooked, nutritious dinners now can I? So, thanks in advance for sticking around to watch Brett Favre yet again... Just kidding...thanks for being patient while I went AWOL from the blog. I'm back to do my time!

The long-anticipated DANCE

2010-02-15T16:04:00.005+01:00

So I promised and here it is weeks later and I'm finally gonna make good on that promise. The twins and Mr. Smartypants had a fabulous time at the dance. They got their picture made, danced a few then split and got ice cream with a couple of their BFFs. All in all it was a great evening. It totally served the purpose it was supposed to serve. The FLW Chaplain's office sponsors this dance yearly to allow Dads a chance to show their daughters how a real date should act. It also allows for father-daughter bonding time. Now, our kids aren't old enough to even know what dating is and you can only really "bond" so much with a three year old at a dance where balloons are present. But it is sooo important for Mr. Smartypants and I that we do things like this with our kids. As our kids get older, they will have evidence of their dad taking time to dress up and do something FOR THEM. He gains little out of this except time with his babies, and more reasons to be loved and adored by them. I am super proud to have a husband who finds these things important above all other things and super proud to be part of an Army and an Army Post that sees the importance in family.
Enough with the blubbering...on with the pictures. That's what you've all been waiting on anyway.

Itchy and Scratchy's BFFs are in the pictures too with their dads. Then the three dads took their dates to Dairy Queen for icecream.

Coming Soon...THE DANCE

2010-02-05T06:50:00.002+01:00

"Are we going to the dance?"
"Can we go to the dance now?"
"Is the dance today?"
"Is it time for the dance?"

No, I do not have teenage girls who are going to prom with the football captain. At least it wouldn't appear that way if you could look in a window of my house (but I'm glad you can't because that would be weird). My girls are preschoolers. There is no highschool football captain here. Just a beat-up ol' dad with bad knees and a couple of stinky brothers. But on Saturday afternoon my preschoolers and the beat-up dad will transform themselves into two little princesses and a knight in (Army Dress Blue)shining armor. The knight will help the princesses up onto (into) his big blue horse (can a Ram be equine for one night? use your imagination here) and whisk them away to the ball (father-daughter dance). The princesses are quite excited about this. I absolutely love that they get this memory with their dad. They will grow up knowing that they are Daddy's special little girls, that they are loved more than life, that they are truly special and worthy of only the best....just like I did. So, girls, the dance is still two days away, but your gowns are ready and I know you'll be the most beautiful princesses there...at least in your daddy's eyes.

The Pioneer Woman Cooks

2010-01-25T03:08:00.003+01:00

by Ree Drummond

*****

As far as cookbooks go, this one takes the cake. If I were gonna write a cookbook this is how I would do it. Good recipes and great stories. It is truly a cookbook you will want to sit and read. A popular blogger by trade, Ree Drummond knows how to chat casually with her audience even in printed word. Her stories will amuse and entertain while her recipes will comfort your soul and your growling stomach. I highly recommend the Rib-eyes with Whiskey Cream Sauce....yummmmmmmm. I hunted this book down and bought it at a Barnes and Nobles in Dallas. I paid full cover price and don't regret it one bit. It doesn't hurt that I was a Pioneer Woman fan long before I purchased the book. The only negative I can find with this book is that some of the recipes are for things that a good Texas girl like myself grew up knowing how to cook. I have my own recipes for beans and cornbread (although hers is good).

Book Review Rating System

2010-01-25T02:58:00.002+01:00

Just so you all know what my rating system will be and what the stars mean:

* Only read it if you have NOTHING else to read. Airplane magazines might be better.

** Read it if you are bored, desperate or stuck in a doctor's office with 2 year old gossip magazines.

*** Read it if your preferred book is already checked out of the library or if you happen to catch it on the clearance rack.

**** Good or very good read. Worth picking up and dedicating some time to read. Might not be a great value, but worth it to treat yourself or someone else.

***** Great read and worth every penny you'll have to spend. Go out and hunt it down. Or, could be a great book at a good value.

My first book review

2010-01-25T02:23:00.006+01:00

Once I let this cat out of the bag, many of you will laugh, and those of you with little girls will nod approvingly.

Fancy Nancy and the Posh Puppy by Jane O'Connor. ****

Now many of you were probably expecting something of a more intelligent tone, and we will get to that I promise. But as a mother, I find myself reading about 100 times more children's books than adult ones so it seems fitting that I would start with the current obsession at my house.

Fancy Nancy and the Posh Puppy is a fabulous tale of a froofy girl and a plain family (I like to make up words as I go). She is glamorous and over-the-top, much like little girls see themselves. It's an entertaining story with a good lesson built right in so well that your kids would never know it is actually good for them (man it sounds like vegetables). There are several Fancy Nancy books and even dolls to go along with it. I highly recommend it for your little girl or a gift for any girl (of any age).

I give it 4 out of 5 stars. (Only four because I really need there to be more of these and because it isn't a super great value as I haven't been able to find the original books in anything but hardback.)

Coming Soon to a Book Shelf Near You....

2010-01-25T02:14:00.004+01:00

I like to read...a lot. I mean, really, if I could spend the rest of my life curled up with a good book I would never want for anything. Except maybe a bathroom and the occasional cup of coffee. One can not live with out coffee. And coffee creates need for a bathroom...I mean really, we all know what I mean. I have had the privilege of reading a variety of good books as of late. Some fiction, some self-help, some cookbooks (yes, you can indeed read a cookbook, I just don't recommend it when you're hungry or on a diet), some serious, some cheesy. I have decided to share my picks with you, my faithful readers. I will even recommend WHO should read it (this will require a bit of stereo-typing so please take all recommendations with a grain of salt and merely as my opinion) although don't let my recommendation stop you if you aren't, say, a teenage girl. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants was an enjoyable read. Even if I haven't been a teenager in over a decade. Wow, I'm really old. Regardless, I will share what I'm reading or have read, and how I feel about it. I would love your feedback if you have read the same book or suggestions for books I should lay my hands on and read. My first review will surface soon....

Looking Back

2010-01-21T15:52:00.002+01:00

A college roommate of mine (and fellow blogger) wrote a post recently that inspired me to write one of my own. When I look back on the previous decade, I am amazed at how much has gone on in my meager little life. And so, for a recap, I present the following:

I.....

graduated college
got a job
got married
changed careers
had a baby
got divorced
moved across the state
moved to Houston
met the most wonderful man in the world
moved back across the state
got married
gave up my career (that I was beginning to not like anyway)
had twins
watched my husband go off to war
raised infant twins and a 4 year old by myself
watched my husband come back from war (safely)
moved to Missouri and
had my fourth (count 'em folks...there are four) child.

My best friend has invested time and money in schooling for counseling and therapy. There is a stress assessment test that they use to determine when one's life has handed them too much. Each major change in a person's life adds points to that person's stress level...the higher the points the higher your stress and subsequent craziness. This said...please read the above list in reference to why I'm crazy as a bedbug. Just sayin'. It is an excuse...but a valid one.

Happy New Year!! And may the next decade be just as stressful!!!!!!!!!!

All I want for Christmas

2009-12-02T15:05:00.002+01:00

*Singing in a Chipmunk voice* Christmas, Christmas time is here, time for toys and time for cheer..."

I'll save the Alvin and the Chipmunks reunion tour for later...for now I will instead just ramble on about whatever comes flying into my brain...cause that usually how I operate...

Seriously, it is now officially Christmas time at the Hawthorne house. Now there has been long a debate in our home over the family Christmas tree. Many of you will laugh, but it is a serious conversation that comes up several times a year and usually results in one of us saying to the other "you're a retard". (In the most loving manner possible, I assure you) My husband INSISTS on having a live Christmas tree every year. He claims that an artificial tree is fake and that he will not have "fake Christmas" because then we would be required to have fake presents, fake Christmas dinner and the like. I prefer the "fake" tree because it doesn't require constant attention to ensure our house doesn't burn to the ground (and that's the way I've always done it). The argument usually includes testimonies to the benefits of each person's preferred tree as well as insults to the other person's preferred tree. Including my favorite, the artificial tree always looks good from any angle, but a real one always has a "bad side" and there have been years when the bad side has been all the way around. I'm all for lookin' good. We have, however, come to an understanding that if Mr. Smartypants is here to retrieve and help decorate the tree, we will have a real one. If he is deployed I will put up the artificial one.
This year, the argument took a new turn. We are getting to go to Texas for Christmas (yee haw!!!) and will be gone for a couple of weeks (thank you Uncle Sam for inventing Christmas Exodus at TRADOC bases all over the Armed Forces). This created a problem. Being gone so long meant that a real tree would not survive our vacation and our house might burn down while we were gone. My husband's solution? Don't put one up at all. Huh??? Can we say "Bah Humbug". A tree must go up. We argued (nicely, I promise) about the tree for several days, debating the reasons we needed a tree up even though we were gonna be gone as well as the reasons we shouldn't bother. If you look at the picture, you can tell who won. He even gave in and let me put up the artificial tree (probably because I made the point we would have to take down the real one the night before we left town). Please know that I gave him the option of having his "real" tree.
Now some of you might argue that Mr. Smartypants was right all along and we shouldn't even bother. But let me leave you with this thought:

Christmas isn't just about one day. Christmas is a season where we prepare ourselves for one day. The one day is to celebrate. Not a day of food and presents and Santa Claus, but one day to celebrate a Birthday. THE birthday. HIS birthday. The Christmas season is another word for Advent, or a time to prepare for a coming of a King. Whether you celebrate HIS birthday or celebrate a chance to feast with family and friends, each symbol of the holiday gives us that warm fuzzy that only comes this time of year. Each warm fuzzy puts us in a better spirit, and makes us want to give and share with others. This is one time of year when we, without thinking, put others before ourselves. Is this not the spirit of Christ in us, as much as the spirit of Christmas? So take time to stare at your Christmas tree for that warm fuzzy, then use the warm fuzzy to remember why we have Christmas in the first place, and then put that warm fuzzy to action by giving (your time, your money or your talents) to spread not just Christmas cheer, but Christ Himself.

I would have pictures but who wants pictures of drool...

2009-11-13T14:21:00.002+01:00

Moose is the last planned baby for the Herd. I say planned because I'm a firm believer that if God wants you to have more children, he's gonna give 'em to ya. Ask some of my friends who were surprised to find themselves pregnant when they shouldn't have been. So, he's the last PLANNED baby, and I'm, of course, spoiling him rotten and hoping he will stay little forever.

But, alas, they must grow up. And moms must be sad about this. My sweet tiny baby Moose is no longer tiny. He's still sweet as chocolate and biscuits, but he's not tiny. Matter of fact, he's getting so big that he has already sprouted his first tooth. It broke through yesterday. I cried. My baby's growing up fast. He's packing his car for college tomorrow in case anyone wants to say goodbye.

I would have posted pictures of our new tooth, but all you would have seen was my finger in his mouth and a WHOLE LOT of drool. And no one wants to look at puddles of drool...especially from someone else's kid.

Change is good

2009-11-11T20:35:00.002+01:00

Maybe you've noticed a little change around here. Maybe you've noticed a new catch-phrase if you will. Maybe you've noticed A NEW TITLE. Yes, you are no longer visiting The Mommy Diaries; you are now visiting the blog Stirring Up Dust. I decided it was time for a change, time for something a little more original. There are other blogs out there with "The Mommy Diaries" as a title and I really wanted a catchy title to go with my subtitle. If you have ever been witness to anything close to a stampede, you know that the dust gets stirred up quickly. I felt it was appropriate. Everywhere we go, we stir up dust. So, going forward, this place, this blog will simply be called "Stirring Up Dust". I would ask that you continue to follow the Hawthorne Herd as we go Stampeding through life. Stick around, it promises to be entertaining.

Silly Saturdays

2009-11-07T15:36:00.003+01:00

Having four children, three of which are three and under, makes for interesting attempts at family photos. My husband and I recently took the herd off into the woods for the ever-coveted Fall foliage family picture. We were gonna use them on our Christmas cards. Let's just say I'm working on plan B. Please note that it was raining that day and we had to run between the van and the photo-op spot during periods of let-up. Here are the resulting photos. The Hawthorne Herd is entertaining at least.

This was one of the better ones.

This was me trying to figure out the timer on the camera.

Not bad, if I hadn't been off in left field by myself, and if Scratchy had smiled.

Cheesey grins and a frown, not to mention Sean was really distracted.

Itchy had put her hand up in her face and we were moaning because we just knew she had been caught in the picture....looks like we were the ones caught.

There is still candy corn in the bowl...

2009-11-07T05:59:00.003+01:00

And if there is still candy corn in the bowl, then it must still be Halloween, right? Well, maybe not, but I thought I'd share some of our pictures from this year's trick or treat fest.

One of the most important jobs we have as parents

2009-10-28T20:46:00.002+01:00

I recently read an article on CNN's website that truly makes me sick. The entire story is disturbing. There are other reports that the school had the nerve to blame the girl's parents. REALLY?? The criminals in this situation are sick individuals and will pay their due. The school is already receiving bad press and will ultimately pay in reputation and community anger. But what happens to the onlookers who did NOTHING for over 2 HOURS??
As parents there are many things we must teach our children. Reading, Spelling, tying shoes, brushing teeth. We teach them about Jesus, about being nice to others, but are we failing to teach them to watch out for and avoid "mob mentality"? Are we teaching them by words and examples to never stand by and watch someone be wronged? Are we teaching them that sometimes the "right way" is also the "hard way"? Have we taught them to have courage to ALWAYS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES stand up for what is right, regardless of consequences? I have found myself having the "not my problem" syndrome. My example teaches my children.
At some point we have to hope the world will look out for our children. We can not shelter them for life. As a parent, I would hope, if my child were a victim of a crime, that some other parent, somewhere had done the hard thing, the right thing and taught their kids to stand up for what is right ALWAYS. I know I'll be trying to do a better job of that myself. May God shower love and grace on this poor girl and her family.

Name that poet

2009-10-27T20:27:00.004+01:00

Here's a little challenge for all my blog readers...

My family and I recently took a little journey. I love Missouri. There are really four real seasons here. Not like Texas where we have two...summer and notsummer. I took a few(dozen) pictures of the trees and while going through them (got my computer to work, see last post if confused) the beautiful scenery brought to mind a little tidbit from my past...

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And I, I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

So, name that poem/author. I couldn't help myself. I saw this picture and those words came flooding back. I believe, although might be mistaken, Mrs. Klepper's 8th grade English class??? Leave me a comment, name that poem, name that author, name that English class. I'll brag on whoever does it first!

While you scratch your head or think about all the (good, bad or ugly) memories that have come flooding back, here are some more pictures for you to enjoy and be jealous of. These were all taken about 5 miles from my house! There are advantages to being stuck out in the middle of nowhere Missouri.

Grand intentions

2009-10-27T20:07:00.002+01:00

I often have the grandest intentions of doing things, but for some reason can't seem to get around to following through on those. This time is different, I promise. I had grand intentions of sharing pictures from a particularly wet thing my family did recently. As I sat down only moments ago, to load the pictures from the camera to the computer, I realized my computer would not read my SD card from my camera. Now, I have done this exact thing a million times and never had a problem. My husband sat down last night and messed with it and now it doesn't work. Now, I'm not pointing fingers or laying blame or anything......but, if the shoe fits...you get it. So now I must spend time trying to figure out what is wrong with this piece of junk, I mean wonderful computer....wish me luck.

The Many Faces of Marin

2009-10-22T20:11:00.003+02:00

O Brother

2009-09-26T16:57:00.003+02:00

Brothers are special people. My brother is pretty special (and today I don't even mean special ed). Mr. Smartypants and his brother have a unique relationship. They couldn't be more different, but love each other inspite of their differences. Now, I'm not a boy, obviously, so I don't get the whole brother-brother relationship but I get that it is unique as I've been able to watch my husband and his brother. I look forward to seeing what happens in ten or twenty years with this:

Gotta love the brother bond. They were watching cartoons together.

The post with no title

2009-09-25T14:28:00.003+02:00

I really have no title, just wanted to share this picture of the herd with everyone. Fall is arriving around here and we are beginning to dress as such. Hats are all the rage this season.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

2009-09-23T04:22:00.004+02:00

Beauty may

indeed be

just in the eye

of the beholder

but behold this

because this is truly beautiful.

Finally...after all that waiting

2009-09-23T03:56:00.004+02:00

Are you sick of waiting on me to get my act together yet? Well, I'm finally getting it together just for you, just because I love you all so. Really, I do....I swear. Okay, so not as much as my kids or my husband, but I still love ya bunches.....

Enough teasing...so I have this exciting new surprise that has kept me busy and away from my computer...and no, it isn't another baby...those of you who thought that will be lined up and shot at will. By a really large firing squad that is really scary looking. I promise...

Okay, really...here we go. Can you guess???

We have a new place to live!!!!!
Now this may not seem like a big deal to some of you, but as Lesli and Debra can testify to, my previous digs were anything but spacious. I've seen ants with bigger houses than what we had. All six of us were crammed into a very small 3 bedroom house with no garage. We literally lived on top of our stuff. We had been on a list for larger quarters since last November. Finally we got called. What a glorious day. The new place is much newer and MUCH MUCH larger. We actually have a place for everything we own! And all our children too. Please pardon the dirty laundry and piles of randomness that appear in every picture. We were moving and hadn't quite gotten settled when these pictures were taken. We are much more settled now, although parts of my house are still a mess (like my closet, go figure). Mr. Smartypants and I are basking in the glory of space. A commodity that was hard to come by a few weeks ago.

A side note:
after looking at the pictures I just posted, I realized they in no way do our house justice in reference to the space we have. The rooms are larger than they appear. I'm a crappy photographer. What can I say?

Surprises, New and Exciting

2009-09-17T04:53:00.003+02:00

I realize it has been some time since my last post and I apologize to all of you who have apparently been stopping by frequently to check to see if I have anything new and exciting for you. Well, I have a really good reason for the temporary abandonment of my postings. I'm still really tied up and busy with said reason, however, I will reveal to all of you in short order, what has caused my absence. I'm sure many of you will be as excited as I am (or at least close). For now however, I have some UFC Ultimate Fighter to suffer through. Apparently my husband knows one of the contestants personally. They apparently swapped sweat (that sounds almost as disgusting as my husband used to smell after those "fights") at the Mixed Martial Arts gym my husband trained at when we lived in Texas. Well, I'll get back to you soon with the exciting new surprise. For now, I must go see what the banging is coming from downstairs.

Eating socks.

2009-09-06T05:19:00.003+02:00

Okay, just when you all thought the washing machine debacle was over, here we go again. Sort of. I ran the front-loading washing machine cleaner through my wash on Thursday and it still didn't work. Actually, it seemed to get worse. Now, we knew that my washing machine was probably really dirty, but I would have thought the cleaner would have helped. It didn't. So on Friday, I took the herd to escort Noodle to the airport and Mr. Smartypants worked on my washing machine. It was, in fact, very dirty. He compared what came out of the drain hose to toxic waste that was probably illegal in every state but Louisiana. So, yes, my machine was very dirty, but that isn't all. There is apparently a small catch basket that sits just outside the washing machine drum to catch larger debris before it goes into the drain hose. Uh, when he opened that up, he found not one, but TWO socks, clogging the little basket. Ya, two socks were causing my laundry nightmare. My washing machine was EATING MY SOCKS. So, if you think your dryer is eating your socks, think again....it's probably your washing machine.

Do I have too many kids?

2009-09-05T14:36:00.002+02:00

The title of this blog is not an attempt to allow you to decide for me if I have too many kids or not, but instead, a post about personal decisions and respect for those. A wildly popular blogger that I regularly read just posted this post about the Dugger family and their recent announcement that baby 19 is on the way. The post made me start thinking (I actually had time for that this morning...I only have three children today) about my own family. Now, four kids isn't really all that many kids. There are lots of families around us with 5, 6 or even 8 kids. I consider those to be big families. Not mine. Its funny, though, because I still get strange looks when I go places. I'm sure I'm quite the sight: two kids in a stroller, one strapped on my chest and another tagging behind me yelling, "mom! mom!" I took Noodle to the airport yesterday to catch a plane to go see his Grandmother in Chicago for the weekend. I got lots of comments about the red hair on the twins, loads more about having my hands full (and yes, I will agree that my hands are full) and even one question about how many were mine (I also had Noodle's 17 year-old half brother with me). Mr. Smartypants and I carefully considered and discussed the total number of children we would have after the twins were born. My nice even number of four children did not happen by accident. We decided to have a baby with the twins and were blessed by two, Moose was also very planned and agreed upon ahead of time. (I won't lie to you, we were relieved there was only one of him). We have agreed that we are most likely done (unless someone who loves us very much wins the lottery) as our resources will limit the number of children we feel we can raise and at some point I would like for all of them to go to school so I can go to the bathroom alone and it not be 3am. But everywhere I go, I get looks. Most in amusement at the circus (and I'll be the first to admit, we are a circus), some in amazement that I so successfully contain them in the afor mentioned manor. Some in disdain because I have so many small children. I got a new look yesterday in the airport: the "please God, don't let her be on my flight" look. He he he...the shock people will be in for at the gate going to Germany if Uncle Sam sends us there next! Can you imagine sitting next to us for an international flight?!? ha ha...even I wouldn't want to sit next to us. All the airport jokes aside, my family is the exact right size for US. We are blessed beyond all reason and I couldn't imagine life without any of my kids. I realize that 4 kids isn't for everyone and that we all choose to have or not have children according to our own lives.
I would beg of you to read the blog I linked to above. She says it better than I ever could. And when you see a mom with many children, even if they're acting like kids, comment to her what a beautiful family she has. If they're well behaved and you notice, say something to her. I know from experience that it will probably make her smile, and she'll feel a little bit better about having to take ALL her kids to the grocery store even when she doesn't want to. And thanks, from the bottom of my heart, for keeping the "she's crazy" and "are they ever gonna stop" comments about me in your head. I know you've had 'em. So have I.

Pointing fingers

2009-09-03T05:27:00.002+02:00

Whenever you point a finger at someone else, you always have four pointing back at yourself. I remember hearing this time after time as a kid. Don't blame someone else because chances are you're to blame, too. Man, I hate it when that turns out to be true. As previously noted, my washing machine has been on the blitz. It's been flashing error codes at me. It's not working, it has had a funny smell for a couple of months. It's all the movers' fault. Then I checked the Whirlpool website to see what the error codes meant. I'm a retard, and its okay because I can admit it. It's looking like the movers didn't break my washing machine. In fact, it may not be broken at all. It may be *gasp* dirty!!! How does a washing machine get dirty, you ask? Well, apparently it is a problem with front loading machines. Because they use so little water, the drain hoses don't get rinsed as well as their top-loading sisters' hoses. This causes all the nasty that was in you clothes to gum up in the drain hoses in your washing machine....eeewww gross....this causes your machine to not be able to drain properly...causing the computer system to kick out the appropriate error codes. Go figure...I need to wash my washing machine.
I'll be purchasing a special cleaner for front loading machines tomorrow, and Mr. Smartypants will take apart my drain hoses to make sure they're clean and kink-free. After all that, I hope that my machine will run appropriately. And if you happen to work for the moving company that moved us to the woods...I owe you an apology. I am sincerely sorry that I blamed you for my dirty washing machine.

I must be doing something right...

2009-08-26T15:32:00.003+02:00

I've always heard that when you're on the right track and doing it right, that Satan will work his hardest to ruin it for you. Well, I must be doing something right. There's an old saying that my mother always uses: When it rains it pours. Well, it's been pouring at my house lately, and the sun is shining so we all know it ain't the wet, watery kind of pour. No, no. I would kill for the pouring to be rain. Instead it is broken things...lots of broken things. I will explain by giving a run-down of my day yesterday. I need to add a little back ground information so you understand the depth of the pouring...my husband's car is on the fritz. Looks like we'll be purchasing a new vehicle soon....very soon. So I get up yesterday morning and start my normal routine. I check my email to find that I have to take snacks to PWOC....snap, no time to fix anything from scratch so that means I'll have to stop by Einstein Brothers Bagels with all three little ones...not exactly my favorite activity, but no big deal. We can do it. Then I go downstairs and my washing machine has a funny code on the digital display. I have one of those cool front loading jobs that lets you wash every garment in wal-mart all at the same time. A necessity if you have a herd of children like I do. Anyway, funny display, so I restart the washer thinking one of the herd had messed with it. Uh, no. A little while later I checked on it again and it was flashing a different error code and had lights blinking all over it...uh...not good. So I fiddle with it and soon realize that it isn't spinning...at all. It's washing, and even rinsing a little, but it won't go into the spin cycle. Now if you've ever done laundry, you know this is necessary in order for you to be able to DRY your clothes. So my washer is officially not doing so hot. It will cost $130 to get Sears out here to service this. We're convinced that this has something to do with the movers that moved us to the woods. They didn't properly "lock" my washing machine and we're pretty sure it damaged it, but we couldn't prove it because there was no visible damage and the machine still worked....until now. And its too late to file a claim. Okay, snot boogers, the washing machine is busted and I still have to go get bagels. So I ignore the dripping wet wash sitting in my machine. Dress 3/4 of my herd (the other 1/4 had dressed himself and escaped for school knowing I would spontaniously combust at any moment) and herd them out the door so we can get to PWOC on time. Things run pretty smoothly, even the stop for bagels. I get to PWOC and realize that I have left my nursing cover at home. I need to feed Moose. I have no blanket, no cover, nothing. And I'm a modest girl. I was in a room full of women who would have been gracious and supportive had I chosen to "pop it out" but I can't bring myself to do that. Yay me! I have no cover. I manage to borrow one from a friend (bless her heart) and all is well again. I finish feeding Moose and we're enjoying praise and worship. Another friend with big kids picks up Moose to love on him, because who doesn't want to hold a cute chubby baby...at least until he pukes all over you....which he promptly puked all down her shirt. And it wasn't just a little...no no...it was a LOT. Bless her, she laughed, wiped it, and was okay. But Moose wasn't. He spent the ENTIRE day throwing up everything he ate....and I mean EVERYTHING. The reason you ask? He doesn't tolerate barbque sauce, I guess. And no, I'm not feeding my newborn barbque, I fed myself barbque, which apparently I can't eat while breast feeding. Along with Mexican food, Italian food, Chinese food, raw veggies, salad, sweet potatoes (even cooked) or dairy. He's doing a little better today, but man, yesterday was messy and gross. So my day isn't going so hot, but my attitude is hanging in there. I even manage to fix dinner for the kids before I leave for evening Bible study and a meeting at church. I manage to be late leaving the house because I was discussing the washing machine with Mr. Smartypants. I knew I was running late, so I stopped at the shopette (convience store for you non-military types) and went to grab my wallet. No wallet. Seriously. Come on now. The following is for you, Debra: I searched my (very messy) car high and low. It's nowhere. I call Mr. Smartypants, highly irritated that I've done this again, and ask if he can find it. He starts looking at home...no go. It finally dawns on me that I had the stroller out earlier in the day...hmmm. Well, of course, there's my wallet, right where I left it in the worst place possible, under the stroller in the cargo hold. So now, I'm officially gonna be late even if I speed. No big deal, I have small children and everyone is late occassionally. I head into the shopette for a Dr. Pepper. Now all of you know how much I LOVE my Dr. Pepper. Some of you have even threatened to have it pumped into me in IV form. I go in to get a nice big icey one from the soda fountain.......(everyone, all together now) it was OUT. Now, my best friend who is reading this understands the catostrophic disaster this is. After a bad day, a Dr. Pepper is a need, not a want. When they're out of Dr. Pepper over ice it becomes hurricane Katrina level disaster. So I settled for Coke, my heart breaking with every sip, and head off to church, where I arrive 15 minutes late. They hear my story at the end of Bible study and proceed to pray for me...and my washing machine. At the end of the day, I still had my sense of humor. Satan didn't win this one...so I must be doing something right.

Update: The toilet didn't need scrubbing today.

2009-08-26T15:25:00.001+02:00

Just to let everyone know, the toilet at PWOC didn't need scrubbing yesterday. But my real toilet still needs scrubbing...I should probably go do that now...

Scrubbing Toilets

2009-08-24T14:12:00.003+02:00

I received an email this morning reminding me that I had volunteered myself to help out in the child care area during my Protestant Women of the Chapel (here forward known as PWOC) Tuesday morning Bible study this coming Tuesday. I had totally forgotten, as I had put my name on the list back in June around the time this was going on. I am more than happy to help out because I have the twins in the program (Sean hangs with me right now) and I feel I should give back to the program that gives me so much (peace, quiet, and sanity). When I was younger, back before I had kids, I thought working child care/church nursery was a great thing to do and a wonderful ministry. Then I had kids...the child care/nursery became less of an awesome ministry and more of a neccessity in my eyes. And a much less desirable place to be. Hey, I'm ringmaster of my own circus 24-7, I don't want to run a circus full of other people's kids too. In spite of the fact that the nursery is the least of my favorite volunteer jobs, I understand the neccessity of it and want to bless other moms so they can have some sanity. Because let's all face it...everyone needs a break from their toddlers now and then. Apparently, I am not the only one who feels like child care is next to toilet scrubbing in the line of chores....way at the bottom of the favorites list. Our child care chairwoman has a difficult time keeping enough volunteers to keep child care going some weeks. And let me explain...we have PAID workers, but our budget only allows for a certain number and if our ratio of workers to kids gets too big we have to rely on volunteers to step up and help out. With that said, its usually not neccessary for anyone to help out, but some weeks we get a really big crowd and have to have one or two extra sets of hands. This shouldn't be so difficult, but it has been. A dear friend was in charge of this for part of the year last year and wanted to pull her hair out because she couldn't get any help. I'm struck by the fact that Christ tells us to "serve one another in love" (Galatians 5:13). Just like we scrub toilets so our families can have a healthy, clean home, so must we "scrub toilets" for our sisters in Christ. Do you have a toilet in your life that no one wants to scrub? Maybe you should just step up and scrub it. It will most definitely bless someone else and maybe they will want to give a blessing to someone else next time and step up and scrub that toilet.
All this talk about scrubbing toilets reminds me that I have real toilets of my own that really do need scrubbing....a mother's work in NEVER done. Now where did I put that bowl brush.....

Walking through Darkness

2009-08-21T14:00:00.003+02:00

Sometimes bad things happen to good people. It's a fact of life. Two people who have devoted their lives to God and would make the world's best parents are left childless. The high school coach/Sunday school teacher gets a horrible form of cancer that is hard to beat. We know these people. They are friends, relatives, loved ones. We cry out to God and ask "Why, Lord?? Why would you let this happen?" I've often found myself saying that. More times than I care to count. I used to think it was that my faith wasn't strong enough to be able to look at a dark situation and be confident that the best would come from it. I've learned that it isn't the case, that even the most devote followers of Christ often cry those words. And it's okay. He may not answer us right away when we cry out that question, but it's okay to ask. Job cried out and asked why. He was a man of great faith but still wanted to know why God would take everything from him. So asking why isn't a problem. What we can take away from Job is the fact that Job had great faith and knew without doubt that God was still God and there was a reason why. Because of his faith, Job continued to praise God, despite of his lack of understanding why. We should follow Job's example. God has a great reason for everything. Even dragging us what feels like a million miles from where we want to be. Today, I am going to choose to be like Job, praising God even when I don't understand why.
God uses the darkness we walk through for good. Isaiah 61:2 claims there are "treasures of darkness" and He uses them so that we "may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel".
The next time darkness falls in my life, I want to choose to praise Him in spite of the darkness, know that the darkness holds riches that will form me into a better person, and a more faithful child of God.
If we can get through the darkness, God has promised us better things on the other side:

I waited patiently for the Lord;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the Lord.
-Psalm 40:1-3

Classic beach bum (without the beach)

2009-08-11T16:59:00.003+02:00

So I've been really bad about posting as of late. Can I help it that this gets in my way???

Life in the Hawthorne house is busy, to say the least. A newborn, potty-training twins, a second-grader getting ready for school to start and a husband who not only works but also goes to school full time keep me SUPER busy (go figure). Not to mention church choir, praise team, teaching Sunday school, the ladies ministry, Tuesday night Bible study and PWOC tuesday morning Bible study as well as the PWOC board (I'm the outreach chairwoman). Oh and of course there's this in order to make a little spending money. I have a list of excuses for not posting as often as I should. But, then again, in the words of my high school's boys' basket ball coach, Chuck Claxton, "excuses are like feet, we all got 'em and they all stink." So I will continue to try to blog, because I like it, because it helps you keep up with us, because it gives me an outlet. You people are like my very public diary (don't worry, I won't be sharing anything that secret with you). I will continue to post and try to do it as often as possible. I'm not sure when the next post will hit, but in the mean time, check out the blogs listed on the right. There are plenty of great blogs to read until I have time to give you some more of my own!

You ask, I deliver...because I'm good like that

2009-07-24T15:19:00.002+02:00

Recently, a dear friend pointed out that I had not shared many pictures of my sweet new boy. I told her I would get on that and refrained from pointing out that she had not shared pictures of her sweet, slightly older baby boy either....not that I'm counting the days since the last picture (23 days if you're curious).

Anyway, here are some pictures of Moose for your viewing pleasure...

This is Moose at his very first baseball game...he was super interested in watching Noodle play ball.

The next two are of Moose's first bath...not so fond of it...much like Itchy and Scratchy were.

Here is another picture of all our "brats". Moose was a novelty...not so much now, the twins just think he's in the way a lot.
That's all for now...Moose is hollering for his mid-morning snack.

Our new neighbor

2009-07-22T15:27:00.003+02:00

Life in the military has its share of ups and downs. One of them being moving all the time. We live in military housing here at good ol' Ft. Lost in the Woods so all of our neighbors are also military. Moving trucks are a common occurrence and it's no big deal to see two or more in the neighborhood on the same day. New neighbors are a given in our life, and they run the range from nosey to friendly to nasty to down right stand-offish. Our newest neighbor seems to flex between nosey (or maybe just really curious) to stand-offish. Check him (or her, we're not sure) out.

He lives in the trees behind our house and often spends his evenings perched on the powerlines that run back there. He seems very curious about us when we choose to hang out on the back patio. I think it disturbs him that Mr. Smartypants was cooking his cousin, the chicken, the other night.

Wow, It's been a while

2009-07-21T14:52:00.006+02:00

Okay, so it's been a while since I've posted anything consistently. I'm gonna try to do better (yes, I'm aware I've said that before...I'm trying, cut me some slack). I have several ideas for some upcoming posts so I have material. Before I get to the really boring pointless stuff I'll do an update on the Herd's recent activities...

Noodle is in Texas at Granny and Granddaddy's house cruising his new go-kart courtesy of Granddaddy. If I only had pictures to share with you. This of course means the twins are back from their adventures with Granny and Granddaddy and Mimi and David. So life has somewhat returned to normal around here. My living room is always a mess and I never have enough hours in my day to get all my housework done. I'm too busy yelling at the twins to quit coloring on the walls. Moose is growing like a weed. All the boy does is eat and then he'll eat some more. I'm often tied to the chair for two hours at a time. I'm curious to see what he will weigh at his 2 month check-up. He was already 9 lbs 7 oz at the two week check up. Mr. Smartypants finishes up this 8-week session of college this week with two finals so he's been busy with his nose buried in his math book for several days. I'll get my husband back on Thursday when he finishes his last final. He'll be all mine (and Uncle Sam's of course) for a week or two before the next session starts.
Moose has been quite the celebrity since deciding to show up. We've had all kinds of visitors. Of course, there was the visit by Granny and Aunt Mistie, Mimi and David also came to see him. One of the most exciting visits was a visit from my one of my college roommates and another friend. They drove all the way in from Houston to hang with us for the 4th of July weekend. Unfortunately, middle of nowhere Missouri isn't all that exciting. We did manage to get in some fireworks with Debra and Brandy and the K family (another army family with small children). The pictures are pretty crappy but I was too busy having fun to worry about the quality of my pictures.

Mr. Smartypants actually had the day off.
Noodle and the K's oldest daughter played together before the sun set while we were getting our fireworks-viewing station all set up.
Moose enjoyed his first 4th of July. He's all of a whopping 9 days old here.

The K's are a hysterically funny pair...and they love self portraits. They must, because there were 4 other able bodied adults who could have done this for them...

Debra and Brandy settle in with the rest of us crazy people to watch the 'works.

Ummm...I really have nothing to say....

2009-07-08T19:08:00.005+02:00

Okay, so I haven't posted in almost two weeks, but really, there isn't much to post about. The twins are in Texas visiting the Grandparents and life has been pretty quiet around our house without our source of entertainment. We did have house guests over 4th of July and I have a couple of crappy pictures that I will post later. I was too busy enjoying their company to take pictures. I go through phases like that. I would rather enjoy the moment than take pictures of it. Then I regret it later, because really, you need a picture to continue to enjoy the moments, right??? Moose is eating and sleeping like a champ. God knew that my hands were full with the twins and I had paid my dues with the chaos of the twins. Moose is only two weeks old but sleeps 5 hours at a time at night. I usually feed him around 11 or midnight and we get up when Daddy goes to work at 430 or so. Then we go back to bed of course, but I can live with 5 hours of sleep and not be a monster so we're all good here.
Noodle has been enjoying his little brother and frequently wants to hold him or help me out. He still yells, "GROSS!!!" and runs the other way when there is a dirty diaper, but he'll give us a hand any other time.

Granny and Aunt Misti were here to greet Moose when he arrived. Then they saved me by taking the twins to Texas.

We, yes I said we, are home.

2009-06-26T15:05:00.003+02:00

Well, finally, after all the waiting, our littlest one finally arrived. Wednesday, June 24, 2009 at 7:51am, weighing a hefty 8lbs, 9.9oz, and measuring a towering 22 inches long. I was scheduled for an induction Wednesday, but baby S decided he didn't like our schedule so much and my water broke Tuesday evening around 5:30. He's a great baby and likes his sleep. Which is fabulous for me. I'm sure it won't last long. We arrived home yesterday afternoon and are glad to have busted out of our "jail". Here are a few pictures of Baby S, better known as Moose.

The "brats" pay us a visit.

Moose and Mr. Smartypants

Mommy and Moose

Breaking out of jail.

Thanks for all your prayers! We are blessed to have him here finally.

Just a quick note

2009-06-23T23:39:00.002+02:00

I know a lot of you have called, wanting an update on me and little baby S. We are still doing fine. I haven't felt all that well for a couple of days. The heat and the extended-stay guest in my belly are a little hard on me. Tomorrow should be the big day. I will be up early, checking with Labor and Delivery here at our wonderful hospital to make sure they have room for me. Assuming that every pregnant woman on post hasn't gone into labor, I'll be having baby S tomorrow. Keep us in your prayers. It might be a really long day. As soon as I can, I'll post and let you all know he made it. Thanks for loving us and wanting to know.

Okay, so today wasn't so life changing

2009-06-22T20:35:00.002+02:00

Well, bummer. Today's doctor's visit was good but terribly uneventful. The stress tests came back good. Baby is doing well and was kind enough to lay off the stubborn streak long enough to cooperate with the ultrasound tech. His little heart was beating well, my placenta looked, in the words of the tech,"surprisingly good for its age", and he is in the right position. What was slightly un-nerving was the amniotic fluid level which registered barely over 9. The normal range is 8-25, so we are still normal (whatever that means, who really is normal these days) but on the bottom end and more time will just mean less fluid. Which brings us to the doctor's visit that followed. Talk about disappointing. I have not made any progress. NONE. I am still dialated to a 1 (whoop-te-do) and still 50% effaced. No change from last week. This isn't very promising. With all that info combined, and the fact that I will be officially 41 weeks tomorrow, we will be going ahead with some intervention. Did you know they now do intervention for stubbornness?? Anyway, Wednesday is the big day, we hope. I will go in (if they have room for me in Labor and Delivery) and the docs are gonna try some non-medical tricks to see if I can go into labor. Just the standard break your water stuff. They don't want to give me a whole lot of meds because of the stress it can put on my uterus which has this giant scar from my last two children. Uteri (if that isn't the plural of uterus, it should be) that have scars like mine does have a tendency to rupture under too much stress. And that just wouldn't be cool. So, if the "non-medical" interventions don't work then off to the OR we will go. So there you are. The latest update on everything you never wanted to know about my uterus, (or uteri in general). Stay posted Wednesday evening for some pictures of the stubborn little creature currently living in my belly.

Today my life will change....hopefully

2009-06-22T14:18:00.002+02:00

Today is a big day for the Hawthorne house. And no, I'm sorry, the baby isn't coming...at least not that I've been made aware of. And considering the situation, I figure I'll be about the first to know. Today we go to the doctor for our first series of fetal stress tests and amniotic fluid level checks. This is common procedure when one is overdue with a overbaked bun in her oven. Promptly after the testing I will see my doctor who will hopefully decide that this baby is coming or needs to come and will send me back to the OB department to schedule my csection. Be in prayer for us that all is well with the baby, but that the doctors all agree there is no need to wait any longer. Maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to jump back on here and let you know that he is REALLY coming...eventually.

Still no baby

2009-06-20T16:03:00.005+02:00

I figured that if you're logging on right now to check my blog its to see if I've managed to get this kid outta me yet. Well, the answer would be no. I hear the sympathetic groans of agony coming from all of you...and thank you for your support. I have officially given up, thrown in the towel, rolled over and played dead, whatever you wanna call it, on having this baby. I'm pretty sure we're gonna have to go in and get him. So I have resigned myself to surgery sometime next week. And I'm okay with that. So with that update out of the way, lets get on to something a little more fun.

The name that photo contest winner:

Lesli from Michigan!!! woo hoo. She was my only entry so she wins by default. There will be something cool in the mail for you soon. Her prize-winning entry?

"Now bubba, swing like you mean it!!"

Thanks Lesli for playing along.

For more entertainment value....here are some more random pictures from the "Herd"

okay, I know I promised

2009-06-17T20:35:00.006+02:00

I know I said yesterday that if I didn't have this baby then that I would post something entertaining for you to view. Well, sorry...I failed at both ends of the bargain. No baby, and no post. I was too depressed, too tired, and too much in pain from the doctor's visit to do anything but take a giant nap. Not really, I cleaned house, hoping that would help put me in labor, but it didn't work. I hate wasting housework like that. So, since I'm such a bum, I decided I'd better do some updating for you people today. The doctor's appointment yesterday was horribly disappointing. It was my due date (see previous post) and I was really hoping for a baby. Seeing as how I'm sitting here typing and not holding a baby, it didn't happen. I am scheduled to go back to the doctor on Monday, at which time I will have a stress test for the baby, they will check the amniotic fluid level and then I will visit with the doctor. After visiting with him (he's in the family practice clinic) I will truck back upstairs to OB and schedule my Csection for sometime next week. So there you have it...No baby, but I do have some entertainment for you.

This is Noodle's first baseball game of the season. Let me remind you that he is a 1st grader playing in a 3rd and 4th grade league. He's really doing well.

The twins enjoy the baseball games as well.

Itchy is all about the sport.

Scratchy, well, she is all about the crowd. A beauty queen needs to see and be seen.

And in the spirit of baseball and all things American and summer...here's a name that photo contest for you. Give me your suggestions for a title for this photo below. I'll select my favorite and if I remember, I'll send you something kinda cool. Not really. I will send you something cool. I promise. (and that is Noodle in the picture with Itchy)

So send me your titles. I can't wait! I'll announce the winner in a day or two, assuming this baby doesn't come soon. And at this rate, he won't.

40 weeks and out of days to count

2009-06-16T15:19:00.002+02:00

Okay, so today marks 40 weeks and I am officially out of days to count down. I am sitting here, posting this early in the morning before I trot off to the doctor for my last regular doctor's visit. From here on out it will be post-term appointments that will include stress tests and more than one doctor's visit per week. They take this whole post-term baby thing pretty seriously around here. I say just take the little brat out. He's beginning to over-stay his welcome in there at this point. Today we will set in motion a few things to start encouraging him to come out. As a VBAC patient (that would be vaginal birth after c-section for those of you less familiar with childbirth terms), I have the option of choosing to do it the old school way and push this kid out, or elect to do less work and just have them cut him out. The joys of undergoing a previous C-section. So, I'm a smart cookie for the most part and I know its better for junior if I can push him out. So that was my choice. Before I knew he would like it in there so much that he would want to stay until he's 18. Now, as I am itching to remove the welcome mat and send him packing to a cradle instead of my uterus, my thoughts turn to c-section more and more. This is the decision I have made. My doctor will most likely be stripping my membranes today (no, that isn't breaking my water, if you want to know what that is, ask a nurse or drop me an email and I'll explain....this is a family program after all), and as fun as that is (about as fun as a root canal), and as effective as it is (is typically effective to start labor within 48 hours) I will be notifying Doc that if it doesn't work, I want to change my mind and be a repeat c-section. So in other words...We'll do the procedure today, and go ahead and schedule a c-section just in case it doesn't work. I like to cover my bases like that.

Okay, seeing as how I have completely overshared with the world, and I'm sure you all were dying to know all about the glorious side of childbirth, we'll move on to other topics. Like underwater basket weaving (okay, so I'm a little short on topics today). If you want something really interesting to read, check out this blog. She's a desperate housewife from the middle of nowhere Oklahoma with a killer writing ability and one seriously well stocked kitchen. There is nothing about her blog that is boring. Funny stories about life on the ranch, her take on homeschooling her punks (because they live so far from town), remodeling advice (both given and sought out), gardening tips, a rancher with some serious forearms, and some of the best recipes EVER. Oh, and great contests...I'm serious, GREAT contests. This week she gave away a kitchenaid stand mixer. She's given away Wusthof knives, bbq grills, and baby socks. Check it out if you aren't already a loyal follower. It will brighten your day. www. thepioneerwoman.com

okay, really I have nothing. If I'm home this afternoon, I'll try to post some videos and pictures for your viewing pleasure. I'm kinda hoping you don't hear from me for a couple of days. Not that I don't love you all, but I'm planning a blogging vacation while in the hospital (only because our archaic hospital doesn't have wi-fi). Keep your fingers crossed the next post is a picture of a newborn!

Congratulations, I guess

2009-06-13T20:49:00.002+02:00

Well, we finally hit 500 here on the Mommy Diaries. Congrats to Jaime Anderson for being my 500th hit. There is no cool prize, just the bragging rights that you hit it right at 500. Maybe I'll come up with a cool prize for 1000. Who knows. At the rate I'm going I have plenty of time to figure it out.

Some thoughts on a few things...

2009-06-12T23:27:00.004+02:00

The last few days in blogland have been days of surprise, shock and disbelief. A blog of a young pregnant woman whose unborn baby had been given a terminal diagnosis has been one of interest that I and a couple of friends (along with thousands of others across the nation and world) have been following over the course of the last several weeks. After pouring prayers out for this young family, waiting anxiously for updates and finally knowing of the birth, the blog world was shocked to find it had all been a hoax. Many people who had been reading the blog were furious. Angry that they had bought into this story and had put their time, effort, prayers, and even money into something that was merely a work of fiction by a very disturbed person. I was saddened that someone could make up such a horrific story for any reason. But from the ashes, God will make beauty. As the truth unfolded, three of this young woman's biggest supporters spoke out on how they too were duped. You can read their statements here. It was with class and dignity like few others could muster that these three women sought to stop the rumors, heal the hurt and remind all of us that God is still God. I am reminded that God can take anything, and I do mean anything, and work it to his good. From this fictious story, came a blog that allowed people who were complete strangers to pray for one another. Prayers of support and love that would have otherwise gone unspoken. It allowed a world full of people to pray for a woman who desperately needed prayer, even if the prayers were sent up with false information. In the end, does it really matter that we all prayed for the "wrong" thing? I don't think so. We took time out of our day to talk to God (is that ever wrong??) and He heard our prayers that were sincere. He ultimately knows what is going on with each of us. He knew this young woman, too. Having followed her story made me more thankful that my own pregnancy was going so well. I would read her blog and stop just to praise God that I have four healthy children, even on days when they were ALL misbehaving. How many times do we stop to thank God for our children when the misbehave??? I am saddened that one woman duped so many people. However, I will say I am more than glad to have been duped if it meant I spent more time on my knees, crying out to God, praising Him the way I should. God works good in our lives every day from tragedy. He gives us what we need to go on and people are resoundingly resilient to life's hardships. If you don't believe me, check this out.

Ecclesiastes 3:11

Week 39, failures of the public educaition system, and I surprise myself

2009-06-11T15:20:00.003+02:00

Okay, so its week 39 and 2 days. I had another visit with my doctor yesterday and again NOTHING, NADA, ZERO, ZILCH. Should I even republish the conversation that we had, it is the same one we've been having for weeks now. "How are you feeling? fine Any pain? no. Okay, great, everything looks good, see you next week." Although this week he did mention that if I showed up for my appointment next week that we would start talking options for getting the baby out. My appointment next week is ON my due date. We'd better be talking options by then...or that doctor's gonna find himself with one really pissed-off pregnant woman on his hands...and we all know that would not be pretty. It could be worse than me with no Dr. Pepper for a week. *shudder* that's just an ugly thought.

On a completely different note...
I would like to think that my husband and I are smarter than the average bear couple. We're intelligent people, right? Well, Mr. Smartypants is enrolled in college while we are stuck, I mean stationed, here at Fort Lost in the Woods, I mean Fort Leonard Wood. He is taking an Algebra class. Now please remember that it has been something like 14 years since he was in high school so that would make his last Algebra class somewhere around 15-16 years ago. The ol' brain is a little rusty and has enough cobwebs in that sector to fill a haunted house. He opted to take a remedial Algebra class to oil the rust and clear the cobwebs before tackling College Algebra. He sat and worked on his homework last night, lamenting the entire time about how he should have paid more attention in school, and how bad he is at math. I nodded my head, knowing full well how frustrating it all is. I took math from coaches in high school. This is not to say that all coaches are crappy teachers or anything like that. Some are wonderful teachers. I'll just say my teacher/coach types didn't work for me. Now, my husband is a really smart dude and is stressing way too much about this, as he finished his homework in short order last night, but I will say this: We are all merely products of the public education system of (you fill in the blank here). Apparently, math is something that certain towns in New Mexico and Texas could use a little improvement on. (And apparently English too, as my language skills are so rusty by the looks of that last sentence that every English teacher I've ever had is wanting to die or hang their head in shame right now)

As for me and my husband's homework, well....you should all know that I'm way too nosey and too much of a busy-body to leave well enough alone. And instead of sitting quitely on the sofa with my crochet (the cable was still out due to a nasty storm that rolled through), I had to go butt in where I really didn't belong. I started trying to help my husband with his homework. Now, after you guys all pick yourselves up off the floor from laughing so hard, I actually surprised myself. I remembered more than I expected to. Seriously. I sat and did half of his homework. Now, I didn't do it for him...no, no. That would be academically dishonest and Mr. Smartypants is way too honest for that. Not to mention that I don't think he trusted that I did it right. I promptly tossed my homework in the trash. I did it more to prove to myself that I could than anything. And, frankly, I surprised myself.

Another day goes by.....

2009-06-09T21:43:00.002+02:00

So here are some updates for all of you who are wondering if I will ever deliver this baby.
1. No, I haven't had this baby yet. But the Good Lord knows I want to.
2. Gwen, my sweet child care provider for the impending delivery, has returned from the Land of Big Ears (aka Disney World, how jealous am I) and is available to take care of all my brats. We were able to hang out for a few minutes today at the park until the weather turned nasty and we all had to run for cover.
3. My mom returned home on Sunday, confident that after having walked all day Saturday with no results of labor, that I would not be having this baby before Gwen returned on Monday. And what a blessing it was for my sweet mama to go on home. Not because I don't want her here, but because she went to the doctor today with a sore throat and came out with Strep Throat. NOT what the Hawthorne clan needs at the moment. She is at home healing and hoping this baby doesn't come for several more days so she can be well enough to come greet him.
4. Went to a fabulous Bible study today with all my Army ladies. The topic was on submitting to authority. Not just our husbands, but any authority God puts us under. A great reminder for a hard-head like myself.
Now you know everything possible going on in my life, oh so exciting that it is. So I'll touch on another topic that is of great interest to me as of late....naturally inducing labor.
Some of you may want to turn off your computer or navigate away from my page, and I certainly don't blame you. For those of you who are curious, have been there, or hope to find yourself in my position in the future, I will go on. It's a topic that has been on my mind a lot lately (go figure). There are a million ways to naturally induce labor apparently. Walking comes highly recommended and if it doesn't work, well, you've gotten some exercise. Of course there is always every man's favorite technique, yes...sex. But I don't know many pregnant women who get this far and get excited about the thought of having sex at all. Sex isn't fun when you're miserable. There is always the bumpy truck ride, but again, that doesn't sound like a whole lot of fun when an 8+ lb baby is sitting on your bladder. Forget worrying about the mess it would make if your water broke, worry instead about peeing everywhere. My aunt suggested a good dose of Caster Oil...eeewwwww I think I'll just stick it out, thank you. But a friend suggested something today, that had been suggested to her by a nurse: evening primose oil. Take two capsules at night and two in the morning. She had some left over from her own pregnancy and delivery so she shared. I plan to do a little research today, possibly start taking them tonight and I'll let you know if its anymore effective than anything else I've tried so far. I find that inducing labor is much like any other problem that doesn't really have a quick fix. Everyone out there has a different solution that they swear by. But, does it really work, or did they just happen to try it at the right time? Who knows, but we all keep trying to quick-fix our problems when sometimes, time is all it takes.

The post-doctor update

2009-06-05T06:05:00.005+02:00

I could have soooo titled this and left it blank. That's the update....nothing. Nothing new, nothing to report, nothing. Can you all tell I'm getting discouraged, downtrodden, depleted, defunk, depressed, deflated....hummmm...wonder how many D words I can come up with.....anyway...this is sucking, frankly and I'm Done (how's that for a D word??) I'm in the home stretch and I'm ready to meet my sweet baby and love on him and share him with the world. Is it so wrong that I want you guys to be able to see the sweet little bit of Hawthorne (is that an oxymoron??? sweet and Hawthorne?) for yourselves? So here I sit. Still pregnant, still huge, still somewhat miserable. Oh, and for some icing on my cake today....all of you that were sticking your tongues out at me because I had only gained like 4 pounds, well, have your laughs now. I gained 5 (thats f-i-v-e) pounds in one week. Yes, you read that correctly. I gained more weight last week than I have my entire pregnancy up to this point. You may now laugh and point, I deserve it. That's what I get for opening my big mouth and being like, "hey, I only....." Shut up Haley. I'm in denial and blaming it all on the baby...he now weighs something like 35 lbs. World record....it's gotta be.
With all that pouting done and out of my system, let me make sure you all know this: I feel fortunate that my baby is as healthy as he is and that my pregnancy, although long and never-ending, has been uneventful. I would much rather sit here and whine and belly-ache than ride the elevator to the NICU all day. I am thankful daily that I was able to be pregnant and I am thankful everyday that I am still pregnant right now.

Just a short little update and a request

2009-06-03T16:38:00.003+02:00

Okay, for those of you on the countdown with me, I officially hit 38 weeks yesterday. Still no news, but I'm hanging in there like I'm gonna be pregnant forever. I go to the doctor tomorrow and will update after my appointment if there is any news.
On an unselfish note....
Yesterday at PWOC (my army gal Bible study) we learned that a sweet sister has a baby girl who will be undergoing surgery in St. Louis this week. Please pray for baby March. I don't know the details, but God does and thats all that is truly important. He gets it, He knows. Please keep this family in your prayers for the next week or so. I'll try to update all you prayer warriors as I know more information about baby March.

Just a quick update

2009-05-27T19:07:00.002+02:00

So I went to the doctor today and it was just another five minute visit. So ya feelin' ok? Yup. Any pain? Nope. Okay we'll see you back next week.

Thanks. No news. I had some contractions last night, but of course they stopped. The doctor did estimate the baby to be about 8 lbs RIGHT NOW. If I go a couple more weeks, he'll be large and in charge. Who wants to put their money on 10lbs??? Any takers???

On a positive, yet somewhat scary note...It looks like we may be getting bigger quarters SOON. Like in the next week or two. Of course, baby Sean will wait until they hand us the keys, tell us we have five days to be out of our current house and then, and only then will he decide that he wants out. Gotta love Murphy's Law.

Tick tick tick tick tick tick

2009-05-27T02:55:00.004+02:00

The clock moves so slow when one is waiting for something to happen. Like giving birth to a very large bundle of joy.
We are officially at 37 weeks today. It is now countdown time. Feel free to place bets on when the baby will actually show up. I am taking the following days/events for mine:
a. Sunday, during the day. My child care arrangement here at Ft Lost in the Woods is leaving with her family to go to Disney World (I'm so jealous, Gwen) Sunday morning and my mom won't be in town until Sunday evening. So there are about 8+ hours that I won't have anyone to watch my kids
b. Sometime in late June; my children have a mission in life to make me miserable.
c. Next week, when housing calls and tells us our new place is ready and we have 5 days to move.

On a positive note, my diaper bag is finished and packed for the hospital (my suitcase is also packed). Here are a few pictures for your viewing pleasure. I love it, it's awesome!!!!

You asked, so I'm delivering....soon I hope

2009-05-24T20:47:00.006+02:00

Okay, several of you have popped up on Facebook and asked me to post pictures of my belly circa 9 months. Here you are. I'm gonna deliver a 20lb baby. It will be a world record. For those of you wondering, as of my last doctor's appointment last week, my total weight gain from my starting weight until now has been a whopping 4 lbs. No I didn't leave out a number. This is ALL baby. At my first appointment I was 210, I am now 214. I should weigh somewhere around 150 after this beast comes out...lol. I wish. Believe it or not, I'm not that miserable. Oh dont get me wrong, I'm miserable, just not as bad as with the twins.

Here I am from the front...not so bad.....

And....turn to the side....BAM!

This is a comparison picture of me just days before I delivered 9.5 lbs of twin baby.

Bring on the Pink!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-05-20T06:47:00.002+02:00

If any of you have linked to the blog about April Rose in my side bar, click over there now and see what B's friend is up to. Tomorrow (Wednesday) is "Hope in Pink" day. It is B's official due date and anyone who has been following her story will be wearing pink in support of B and baby April. Throw on something pink, say a prayer of hope and healing, and take your picture! I will be.

Monday Munchies

2009-05-16T21:58:00.021+02:00

I realize today isn't Monday, but I've been working on this post since Sunday, seriously. It takes forever to get photos to upload here. Must be that awesome Lost-in-the-Woods internet connection. We're so high-speed here.
This was dinner Friday night and it was really good. Nice for summer, so light and fresh. I'll put the whole recipe at the end.

Cilantro Lime Chicken with Avocado Salsa
First the Chicken.

It takes a marinade that looks something like this:
our marinade ingredients: olive oil, lime juice, salt & pepper, onion, jalapeno, garlic, and cilantro

Add the olive oil to the chicken breast.

Take the cilantro, onion, jalapeno, salt, pepper. lime juice, and minced garlic and throw it in the bowl with the chicken. Let it marinate for 30 minutes or so while you prep the salsa.
Then just throw it on the grill and grill the chicken.

Now for the salsa....

your ingredients:

That would be tomato, jalapeno, garlic, onion, lime juice, avocado, salt and pepper.

Chop the tomatoes.

Then add the onions.

Next, the garlic. Note the garlic press.....every kitchen needs one....love garlic, hate the nasty smell it leaves on my hands. This little tool saves me. You can actually leave the paper shell on the garlic clove. Just scrape it into the trash when you're done.

Then add in some lime juice.

Next, the jalapeno. This little plastic thing is a jalapeno tool. i'm sure it has a real name, but who knows what it is. However, if you don't have one, and you love jalapenos, get one. If you can find it. My mother gifted this one to me. I love it!!!

The results speak for themselves. (I'm kinda a weenie when it comes to heat. I like the flavor, but I don't care for my mouth to be on fire.) Now, with your lovely, cleaned out jalapeno, chop it up and add it to the mix. Add a little salt and pepper too.

Then chop your avocado. These bad boys keep forever in the fridge. Leave them out on your counter overnight before you use them. I didn't, and they were really too green.

After all that chopping, enjoy your salsa. It is super yummy. Perfect for summer.

Now for the recipe:
The chicken:
4 boneless skinless chicken breasts
1/2 cup olive oil
1 clove garlic
1/2 small onion
1 jalapeno
2-4 tbsp chopped cilantro (depending on taste)
juice from 1/2 large lime or 1 whole small one
dash of salt, pinch of pepper

Combine all ingredients except the chicken, stir well, add chicken and marinate for 10-30 minutes. Grill.

The Salsa:
2 avocados
juice from 1/2 lime
1 tomato
1/2 small onion
1 jalapeno
1 clove garlic, minced

chop the tomato and onion and combine in a bowl. Add the lime juice, chopped jalapeno and garlic. Mix well. Chop and add the avocado, stirring gently. Serve with chicken.

It's been a while....

2009-05-15T21:57:00.007+02:00

So it's been a while since I've posted anything noteworthy. I have fallen off the wagon on Monday Munchies and Tuesday's Tornadoes so I will be blessing you with a little of all of the above, even though it isn't Monday or Tuesday. I have the greatest kids on the planet (at least I feel that way sometimes, but we all know it passes quickly). We accompanied Mr. Smartypants to softball practice and here are some delightful results of said trip:

How is it that Scratchy can go from this....

...to this so quickly??

Oh yes, this is why (please notice Scratchy's rear).

She busted it in the puddle. It was quite graceful....wish I could have gotten it on camera. Not unlike her graceful mother...who, by the way, spent Sunday (that would be Mother's Day, if you're keeping track) in the Labor and Delivery Ward at the hospital. No, the new baby isn't here yet (give me some credit, I'll let you know). I gracefully tripped over my own two feet and slid into homebase in the fellowship hall at our church. Nice, right. It's genetic...just ask my dad...he's picked my mom up off the floor too many times to count.

So what exactly happens when grown men gather to play softball, you ask? Well, they forget to call the parks and rec department to get keys to the field to practice so they get locked out, but decide to have practice anyway. What happens when one of the grown men hits a ball over the fence into the locked field???

This:

Noodle becomes "ball boy" and must scale an 8 ft fence about 50 times over the course of an hour.

Where is Itchy in all of this....well, being Itchy of course...
I'll be back later with a recipe and maybe some other stuff too. My connection takes forever to upload pictures.

Since we all have nothing better to do...

2009-05-06T14:57:00.006+02:00

Not really, I mean, I know we all have tons of stuff going on in our lives, but there is a little event (if you can call it little) going on tomorrow that I would like to remind everyone of. Yes, tomorrow is the National Day of Prayer. If you aren't signed up for a time slot through your own church or religious organization, I would encourage you to stop at some point during your day and talk to the Big Man. Not sure what to pray for? Well, the event is coordinated so that we can collectively pray for "the powers that be". Aka the Government, the Military (a special shout out for this one, we need it), the Media, Business, Education, Church, and Family. It was signed into law as a nationally recognized day by good ol' President Reagan in 1988 (thank you Ronnie) who must have had insight into where our country was headed and what would be needed to our country from digging itself a hole straight to...well you get the idea.
Still not sure what to pray for?? Well, here's some stuff that will make you want to fall to your knees and cry to God...

President to observe National Day of Prayer privately
(um, a paper proclamation??)

High School Teachers Influence Student Views Of Evolution & Creationism, U Of Minnesota Study Finds

The American Family in Decline

Not to mention that everywhere you turn, our business and financial system seems to be crashing down around us. We should all say a prayer for all the Madoffs out there ripping off innocent Americans and throwing our financial system into chaos.
There are a million and one other things to pray for, but, lest we forget, there is much in our country that needs our attention. I hope you take time to speak to the Big Man about things that bother you.

Big Mike's Potato Salad

2009-05-04T06:16:00.002+02:00

Today marked the 7th anniversary of my introduction to the joys (read: pain) of motherhood. Yup, that's right, Noodle turned 7 today. Wow, has it really been that long? I've been a mom for 7 whole years??? No way, not possible...but then again, I guess it is, because, well, it is. One would think that this would make me an expert. But no. Seven years and three and a half kids later and I still run across issues daily that make me scratch my head, rub my chin and shrug my shoulders. I have spent the last 7 years making mistakes. I would hope I have learned from my mistakes, and I'm sure sometimes I have. But so often I doom myself to make the same mistakes again...like failing to learn to never give your kids peanut butter on a spoon and let the go to the living room to watch tv. I have spent the last 7 years screwing up so bad that I sit in wonder that my son is still alive, much less seemingly well-adjusted. If there was ever a poster child for parents who screw up but the kid still turns out ok, it's him. I am lucky. No, I am blessed. I look back over the last seven years of screw ups and see how God has taken care of us. I can't blame anyone else for how he has turned out so far. Often it was just he and I. But on the flip side, there are many who can take credit for how well he has turned out, mainly God. My parents have been and remain to be a huge influence in his little life. They guide him with patience and grace that a parent lacks. It must be the mellowness that comes with old age. My sweet, darling husband deserves a HUGE deal of credit for the last four years. With Noodle's real dad often working overseas, he lacked a father figure, until Mr. Smartypants came along. Mr. Smartypants took Noodle in, treated him like he was his own flesh and has continued to do so even with the arrival of his own flesh and blood. There is NO man, aside from Christ, that I would hope my son would model himself after other than my husband. I'm blessed like that. I hope that my sons will model themselves after their father and hope my daughters will seek men like their father to marry. I could ask no more for any of them.
I have actually learned much over the last seven years. I have learned that God has given me way more patience than I ever imagined I possessed. I have learned that the person I thought I would be is not who I have turned out to be. But I like this me much better than the person I thought I was gonna be.
We spent all day Saturday celebrating Noodle's birthday with a barbeque, cupcakes and a pinata. Now I sit here and contemplate celebrating seven years of the blessings of motherhood while I enjoy my tenth helping of leftover potato salad, recipe courtesy of Big Mike all the way from Iraq. Maybe he'll give me permission to share the recipe with all of you. But, if I am allowed, I will only post it on one condition...you can never, never, never show it to your doctor. Just the ingredient list would cause cardiac arrest.

God knows

2009-04-28T01:13:00.002+02:00

As of late, it seems that everywhere I turn there is another story of a newborn or a fetus in a desperate situation. Babies with heart conditions, birth defects, and genetic conditions glare at me from my computer screen with every click of my mouse. Most of the time I wouldn't concern myself with, well, myself, but being pregnant makes me stop and think. Am I seeing all this now for a reason?? Is God preparing me for something that is about to happen in my own life?? I have experienced God's wisdom and hand enough in my life to know that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. There is a reason I'm seeing all this now, why all this is happening now. The mother in me began to panic. Don't be alarmed, the panic has faded and has been replaced by something far better...trust.
You see, I have realized that God put all of this in front of me, not to prepare me or to make me panic, but to learn to really trust Him. Along with sick babies, there has been a recurrent theme with their stories...mothers who trust Him. And I don't mean mothers who trust that God will fix their broken babies, because they don't. They don't trust that God will fix the babies, but instead they trust that God's plan is at work. They trust that God's will is at work. They trust that even though they don't understand, even though they hurt, that, ultimately, God has a bigger miracle in the works. One mom even went as far to say that she was honored to suffer on God's behalf.
Now, I don't say this to say that I think something bad is going to happen or that we have been chosen to suffer for Him. I don't know. And, frankly, people, I don't care. That's right, I don't care. Please don't take this the wrong way. I certainly care for my unborn child. I care that he is healthy and happy, but that is my earthly selfishness. When I say I don't care, I simply mean that I am ok with God's plan, whatever it is. I am learning to trust God and know that whatever His plan includes, that it will be okay. No matter what happens, it will be okay.
Why, you ask, would I be okay with anything happening. Simple. God knows. God, right now, already, weeks before my precious package is set to arrive, knows everything about his little life. EVERYTHING. God knows the exact moment my little guy will arrive. He knows the exact length, in milliseconds no less, of my precious one's life. Every move, every scratch, every hiccup, God knows it all. God knew all that before my parents knew me! God has known all along our exact paths. He knows my future as well as that of my children. Wow! God knows everything that will happen and He uses it to further His kingdom. You ask how a self-proclaimed control freak can let go and be okay with anything? I know God is in control, that's how.
All these sick babies with faithful moms have taught me that. They were and are able to handle anything that comes their way with peace because they understand that even when they're not in control, ultimately, God is. Who better to control a situation that is out of my control than God?!? Really.
So, rambling completed, I will finish with this last thought: I don't know if God is preparing me to deal with something major or not (and even though the control freak in me would like to know, I'm okay with that), but what I do know is that God has used these experiences and exposure to other faithful moms to make me a more faithful mom. I am learning to let go and trust Him more everyday simply because He knows.

2009-04-23T16:34:00.003+02:00

God is full of joy and surprises for His children this week. It is God's holy week of answered prayers. For those of you who link to other blogs through mine, I hope you have had the opportunity to link to Little April Rose and read this amazing story of forgiveness, faith, love and trust in God's big plan. This unwed Christian woman made a mistake, found herself pregnant, dealt with that, only to find out that her unborn baby girl would probably not live. The doctors have encouraged her to induce early and just get it overwith. They feel the baby has no chance of survival. The baby is still alive, but over the last few weeks her heart rate had begun to slow down. At last check it was somewhere in the 80s. Normal for a fetus is a min. of 120. Her heart was getting weaker. God's children prayed for this unborn baby and this mommy they didn't know personally. Check out the u-tube video she posted on her blog yesterday. If this doesn't remind you that God answers prayers, then nothing will. The doctor has no explination.

The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer.
-Psalm 6:9

The power of Corporate Prayer

2009-04-22T00:48:00.002+02:00

I have an amazing "God story" to share today. It reminds us that God hears us when we pray and where two are gathered in His name, there He is also...

I would like to introduce to you Jenny. Jenny is a British citizen, living here at Ft Leonard Wood with her husband while they take care of their grandkids. The parent(s) is(are) deployed overseas right now. Jenny's husband is (as I understand) a US citizen (perhaps dual citizenship, I'm not sure) with the lovely accent. Jenny recently found out that her application for her visa extension had been denied. No one really knows why, other than our government has the power to do that. Apparently, according to the US government, she had over-extended her welcome here in America. She was going to have to leave her husband behind to take care of two elementary aged children to go back to England for 6 months before she could reapply to come back. She was understandably upset. The entire family was. There were phone calls made and paperwork rushed and everyone that could possibly try to help was helping. Her deadline to be out of the country was Thursday, as in day after tomorrow. She still had not heard anything. She had begun mentally preparing herself to go. Knowing that God hears His children when we cry out His name, the ladies at PWOC (my army ladies Bible study) gathered together to pray for Jenny and her situation. Ladies and gentlemen....always, always, always, remember that God hears us when we pray. Jenny got a phone call this afternoon informing her that she had been approved to STAY. The formal letter is in the mail. She will not have to leave those sweet children behind without a mother-figure after all.
We must all remember that, not only does God hear us when we pray, but He ultimately answers our prayers in HIS time. Even if that means we must wait until the last possible minute.

Encouraged

2009-04-17T15:56:00.002+02:00

As another week has flown by, and I am one week closer to completing this whole look-like-I-swallowed-a-beach-ball thing, I am amazed at how quickly this weekend has approached. This weekend is to be a time of rest for mommy. A time of reflection and peace and quiet (I just hope I can stand it). I am scheduled to go on a ladies retreat this weekend to Branson. I was looking forward to it until yesterday. I opened my email containing the details of the weekend (which were FEW) and got a bad taste in my mouth. I am a little concerned that this weekend may not turn out quite like I was expecting. I am still going with the thought that I am being negative and need to get over it and the hope that my gut instinct to bail at last minute was not right. Pray that I get the most out of this weekend, that I allow God to use whatever comes my way to draw me closer to Him and give me the much needed rest I am looking forward to. In an effort to turn my attitude around, I tried counting my blessings. It seems I have been doing that a lot lately and it didn't seem to help the negative blah feeling go away, so I decided to look around me and be encouraged by the positive things I see. So here it goes....I AM ENCOURAGED...

I am encouraged by my best friend's effort to take care of herself for all the RIGHT reasons.

I am encouraged that my friend in Texas is using this opportunity to take care of herself too.

I am encouraged that although my husband is very sad to see me leave for the weekend, he is ENCOURAGING me to go because he knows how badly I need the break.

I am encouraged that I have a friend willing to step up and take my kids for a large majority of the weekend so I can do this even though my husband has to work.

I am encouraged to see the outpouring of prayers for total strangers all over the country.

I am encouraged to be a part of a women's ministry (although small) that wants to grow, love God, and love each other.

I am encouraged that I feel as well as I do, considering the size of this baby.

I am encouraged that now my attitude is improving.

And the winner is.....

2009-04-16T15:46:00.002+02:00

Okay, after waiting several days to see if anyone else would put in their two cents (good thing I didn't really need two cents...you people would have left me broke) I had only two suggestions....but...in reality one of the suggestions was spot on. Lesli, of Keeping up with the Kovics, reminded me that my son has a nickname that has consistently been in use for years. She was right...how could I forget...so.....Lesli, look for your prize in the mail in about six months...lol.

The kid's nickname will be...

Noodle

thats right, Noodle...no big story behind it. Lesli has always called him Noodle. She'll have to do a guest post to explain because I have no idea.

Thanks Debra for the other suggestions...they were great!

Thursday's Treasures

2009-04-16T15:19:00.006+02:00

Seeing as how I missed the weekly post on Tuesday, I will post something for your entertainment today instead. The reason for missing the post is simple...they really didn't make much mess. Shocking, I know.

Those of you who have been to my house and have been referred to as "family" instead of "guest" have seen the piles of laundry. I am notorious for letting my laundry get backed up...I HATE laundry. I've gotten better about it since my laundry pile and my machines are in my kitchen...you can't ignore the elephant in the room when it stands between you and your precious Dr. Pepper. Occasionally it still gets backed up. I have a busy week and laundry sometimes takes a backseat. As is the case this week. (I have big plans today to get caught up on that) Sometimes, my family gets really irritated that they are having to turn their underwear inside out and take matters into their own hands (nobody gross out...I'm kidding about the underwear)....

....this is when Tuesday's Tornadoes turn into Thursday's Treasures...

...into the dryer....

...out of the washer...

...into the dryer...

Everyone should have a set of these...the machines, not the toddlers...well, maybe the toddlers if they do laundry...

Itchy actually loves to help with the laundry...and I'm not THAT far behind this week. She was buttering me up for some pink milk...kids will do anything for pink milk.

Monday Munchies

2009-04-13T23:01:00.003+02:00

Okay, so here we go...another episode of Monday Munchies. I pondered all weekend about what I could share with you today as I tried nothing new this week and we ate out a lot...way more than normal. But then it hit me...duh....I made the most "Haley" meal last night for dinner. Amy's quick and easy Alfredo. And let me tell you folks...it is easy...scary easy...so here you go...try this one...the kids love it and you can make it as fattening or as healthy as you choose. I will give instructions for the healthy version and you can substitute fatty ingredients if you choose. It is good either way.

Amy's Quick and Easy Alfredo

2 packages of low fat cream cheese (don't use fat free, you need a little bad for you or it will turn out weird)
2 tbsp butter (or whatever butter substitute you use)
Italian seasoning
garlic salt
milk
cooked pasta of your choice

melt the butter in a large skillet. add cream cheese. Melt the cream cheese, stirring OFTEN. once cream cheese is melted, add garlic salt and italian seasoning to taste (this is usually 2 tsp of garlic salt and 2 tbsp of seasoning, give or take. you can always add more later). once this is stirred in add milk. The amount of milk depends on how thick you like your sauce and how long you want to mess with cooking it down. It is usually a couple of cups. Let this simmer for approximately 10 minutes. Check the taste and adjust seasoning as needed. Poor over pasta, toss and serve.

This is super fast and easy. Need to add some protein? Add shrimp, chicken, whatever you have. It's yummy. We had chicken in ours last night. The kids all cleaned their plates.

Everyone needs a nickname

2009-04-10T21:39:00.002+02:00

Okay, seeing as how I'm approaching 100 hits since I started counting on this blog that I was sure no one would read, I have decided to follow in the footsteps of so many bloggers gone before me and give my family nicknames to protect the innocent (or in my opinion, not so innocent). So this is the beginning of the nicknames and you, all my fabulous followers, will not only know the nicknames but why I chose them and the story behind my choices. Let's start with my sweet, darling hubby....

Now, there are a million and one things I could think of to call him depending on my mood, but I'll save you all from that and pick a name that describes him ALL the time...regardless of my mood. In my previous post I referred to him as Mr. Smartypants...and I believe I will stick to that. Oh, I could give him some sweet, loving name similar to MckMama's prince charming, or follow in BigMama's footsteps and just call him D. But that's not me...or him for that matter. Don't get me wrong, he's most definitely my prince charming. He rode up like the knight in shining armor (or dusty camo, if you will) and whisked me away on his silver stallion (which we traded in on the minivan pictured in the previous post....what a husband...gave up his man ride for a bus big enough for our brood). But romantic comparisions aside, he is by all accounts a smartypants, from his quick-whitted barbs back at me (notice I say BACK at me...I usually start it) to his knowledge of all things manly. He looks like a guy's guy...all muscle and beer, but in reality...he's a closet NERD. Yes, a nerd. A history nerd. Ask him what George Washington's favorite color was...he knows that crap. How many blades of grass were trampled at Gettysburg...yup, knows that too. Freaky, freaky smart. Our bookshelves are lined with non-fiction HISTORY books *gasp*. Could our house look any nerdier?? Makes my collections of Shakespeare, modern American fiction and Victorian poetry look puny in comparison. He's currently enrolled in college and is taking basic American History (the first half) this session. He complains weekly that his teacher has his facts wrong...seriously??? Would I have known if my teachers were feeding me incorrect information...not a chance. So Mr. Smartypants it will be.

The twins are easy. I have been calling them Itchy and Scratchy for the longest time. The oldest, with the short hair will be Itchy and the younger with the long hair will be Scratchy. Have to be fair about it and do it alphabetically. It's the only way to make it work. If you're wondering why Itchy and Scratchy, it has to do with Mr. Smartypants. He had roommates that he sometimes referred to as itchy and scratchy...and it sounds better than Frick and Frack. I started calling the girls Itchy and Scratchy and it just stuck for me.

The new baby will just be "the new baby" for a while. We'll have to see what he looks like and what his personality is when he gets here. If current conditions are any indication...he may just be called "the spaz". He's always movin' and shakin'.

The oldest boy will be next. I'm not sure about his. He is an animal of a different nature. We called him Chunky Monkey as a baby...certainly doesn't fit now...he's a pencil these days. Mr. Smartypants often calls him "the boy". Not unlike Johnboy. You, my faithful readers, might know the boy...here's your chance to put your stamp on my blog...send me your suggestions. If I use one of your suggestions, you will win a prize. Nothing glamorous, but a prize. So start thinking....send me a nick name for the boy. This is the next best thing to being able to name my baby.

Hmmmm....that gives me an idea if we ever decide to have more....

Just kidding....the baby factory will be closing soon....there will be unfertilized eggs in the unemployment line.

Tears from Heaven

2009-04-10T05:09:00.010+02:00

Why, oh why, does it always rain on the saddest days of our lives. Could it be that the rain drops are the tears of angels sharing in our grief. Today was a sad, sad day...

The angels cried....

The new leaves on the trees even drooped sadly....

The dog is sad....

Even the boy is really sad today....

(okay, so the dog always looks like that and the boy was faking it for the camera, but it helps the point)

But for a Texas girl who has been removed from "the homeland", days like today are extremely sad ones.....

The reason for all the tears you ask.....
Can you see it...can you tell....its hard to see.

We just put (oh i can hardly bring myself to say it...) MISSOURI PLATES ON MY CAR!!!!!!! SOB SOB SOB SOB

(my husband, Mr. Smarty pants, asked me to black out the actual plate number. I'm impressed I was able to figure out how to do it...I'm not the most computer literate person I know)

So very very sad that I can no longer say I live in Texas. Now I know I haven't lived in Texas for a very long time (anything over 2 weeks out of state is a very very long time) but having to admit that I'm "from" somewhere other than Texas is heartbreaking. Luckily for me, I can always claim to be a Texan, as I was born and raised there. For the last 30.5 years of my life, I have called Texas, and only Texas, home. To be uprooted at this stage has traumatic side effects. I have coped well. I have missed blue bonnets, sea food and Tex-Mex, but I have learned to love from afar. My truly Texas friends have tried "therapy". Sending me pictures of fields of bluebonnets, making sure I ate real Tex-Mex when I came home for a visit, etc etc. And I have coped. I have griped about the driving here, citing Texas drivers as the only ones who know, truly know, how to navigate the highways. I have complained about the "hillbillies", stating that in Texas, we may be rednecks, but we are high class rednecks. And now...I must finally give up the fight, roll over and admit to the world....that I too am from hillbilly land. I can no longer drive down the highway and have the world know that I am from the best place on Earth. Texas, my Texas....oh how I miss you....

Tuesday's Tornadoes

2009-04-07T14:56:00.010+02:00

Here's a regular Tuesday post for you. I've noticed that Tuesdays are the emptiest days in blog land. We all need something to read about or look at, soooo...Tuesday will be the weekly update of whatever mess the twins have managed to create...have fun laughing at me and thinking to yourself, "so glad that's not me".

This is Marin...she decided that the kleenex box needed to be emptied...on the floor.

So, being the mean mommy that I am, I made her clean it up....

She even put them in the trash. Way to go, Mar!!!!
(nice pic of my trash...sorry about that)

A few days later, we had our friend Audrey over for play time while her mommy went to the doctor for a check up. Being the genius that I am, I let them finger paint. Enjoy the artwork that was a product of great creativity. No VanGogh's in this bunch, but they might grow up to be killer tatoo artists.
This is our friend Audrey. She was the cleanest of the bunch...

Marin, slightly more mess here...
notice the back of the chair she's sitting in.

Sweet little Megan....walking art.

The week was so exciting with all the mess that the girls turned out sick on Monday. This is what twin tornadoes look like when they're under the weather....pardon the pun.

Monday Munchies

2009-04-06T19:33:00.003+02:00

Here we go, another fabulous meal to feed the masses. I'm no Paula Dean, but this crap is gooooood.

Awesome Potato Soup

courtesy of Gwen Dowell

2 lbs. potatoes, peeled and cut into 1/2inch cubes
1 chopped onion
2 cans of cream of mushroom soup (can use chicken...heard its fabulous this way too)
garlic powder (be brave and gormet...try real garlic chopped and let me know how it works for you)
ground red pepper
1 cup sour cream
2 cups milk
2 cups shredded cheddar

Put potatoes, onion, soup, garlic (to taste), and red pepper (also to taste) in a crock pot and cook on low 8 hours or on high 4 hours.
Add milk, sour cream and cheese and cook on high 10 minutes.
Serve

In the words of Rachel Ray...yummo.

This is a great meal to feed the clan when you're busy. Or to take for potluck at church. Have leftover Ham from Easter dinner? Chop it up and throw it in too. Bacon? sure. Good with turkey too. Dig through the fridge and find your leftovers (chicken anyone?) and throw it in there. It's awesome. We eat this regularly when I'm gonna be busy in the afternoon and won't have time to start dinner when I normally would. My hubby gets excited when he walks in the kitchen and sees the crockpot with white creamy stuff in it. Loves it! The kids eat it up too.

And as an added bonus this week....

another fabulous recipe

My kids think these "biscuits" are the greatest thing ever.

You know the scone you bought the last time you went to Starbucks? The one you payed $3 for? Here's the recipe...and they are sooooo EASY. Love these things!! And they aren't too sweet. Just sweet enough. The traditional directions are in regular black font...the "Haley" version are in red directly under the traditional in each step.

Scones

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons sugar
4 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon of salt
1/3 cup butter, cut into pieces
2 beaten eggs
3/4 cup whipping cream (aka heavy cream)
cranberries
sugar

1. In a medium bowl combine flour, 2 tbsp sugar, baking powder, and salt. Using a pastry blender, cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Make a well in the center of flour mixture; set aside.
1. Instead of using a pastry blender, I use my stand mixer and the regular paddle.

2. In a medium bowl combine eggs, cream and cranberries. Add egg mixture all at once to flour mixture. Stir just until moistened.
2. Mix on low speed until moistened.

3. Turn dough onto lightly floured surface. Knead dough by folding and gently pressing dough for 10-12 strokes or until dough is nearly smooth.
3. Switch the regular paddle on the mixer for the dough hook. Run on medium speed until dough is smooth and balls up.

4. Divide dough into 2 chunks and pat each chunk into 5-6 inch circles. Cut each circle into 8 wedges
4. Now bust out the lightly floured surface and do as instructed in traditional step 4.

5. Place wedges 1 inch apart on ungreased baking sheet. Brush wedges with extra cream and sprinkle with additional sugar. Bake in 400 degree oven for 12 minutes or until lightly golden. Remove from baking sheet and serve warm or store in airtight container for several days.
5. Place wedges on parchment paper on cookie sheet. Follow remaining directions.

These are super yummy. You can substitute blueberries, dried cherries or any other dried fruit for the cranberries...I happened to like the cranberries. Need a breakfast treat for a holiday party? Use decorators' sugar instead...you know, the colored stuff that comes in shakers that you see on the end of the aisle at Wal-Mart next to the themed cupcake paper holder thingies.

Have a yummy week!!!

Yet another reason to pray.

2009-04-06T19:19:00.003+02:00

I just got off the phone with my mother, who had a grand ol' time giggling at me hollerin' at my "sick" kids who don't seem so sick right now. In the course of the conversation, she shared a story of a family in her Sunday school class (yes, another one). They just had their third child recently and he was born with Down Syndrome. As if that isn't enough to deal with, he came out oxygen deprived and very very very blue. After more than a week, he is beginning to look less like a smurf and more like a human. The baby's mom is in Dallas at the hospital with little Jacob, Dad (out of sick days, etc as a teacher) is at home with their other children and struggles with not being there with his sick baby. On top of being seperated and stressed, Dad has bronchitis. They need all the prayers they can get. Please pray for this family. They have a long, long road ahead of them. Follow their story, the link is on the right. This is truly Jacob's battle, but it will be God's victory.

Copy, paste, copy paste

2009-04-06T12:39:00.003+02:00

I know, I know, I should come up with my own material for this blog. But, darn it!, Kevin is just sometimes too profound to not share. For those of you reading this that haven't followed my blog since its inception, Kevin is the author of the "Carwash" blog I quoted several weeks ago. He is also my parents' Sunday school teacher who is suffering from Cancer. Amazingly, God continues to bless others through him, even in his time of need. Say a prayer for Kevin, then read the following entry from his blog Kevin's Marathon. May you head back into the world today.

If you have read my blogs at all, I am sure you realize that I am a follower of Jesus Christ. You might not know, that I am not only the son of a Southern Baptist minister, but my grandfather was a minister, and now my oldest son, Ryan, is an ordained minister. It breaks my heart to tell you some troubling news. The church, as I know the church, is suffering and quite possibly dying. I do not want to bore you with the statistics, I want to ask you, if you attended a church growing up, to describe that church now. How many people between the ages of 21 and 35 attended this church? Use one word to describe the church of your childhood.

I love Jesus. I love the church. Change must happen if we want to connect to culture around us. I am reading an informative book, They Like Jesus, But Not The Church, by Dan Kimball. This man is a pastor, and one of the things he did was to get out of the church office. Now you must understand that his church allowed him to do this, but would you? He began to get his hair cut in a different area of town, prepare his sermons at the local coffee shop, and began to get out of the Christian bubble. As he talked to people, he found out that they respect and like Jesus, but they don't like the church.

So why am I calling this Shorty's sermon? We have an aerobic septic system and have a maintenance agreement. This last summer Shorty came out to work on our system. Chris and I visited with him and he shared how he was attending a cowboy church. We had a great conversation. Little did we know what the next few months would hold for either of us.

This past fall, I was diagnosed with cancer. During the same season, God called Shorty to start a church outside of Sulphur Springs. He started this church with 2 families. They now have 70-80 in attendance each Sunday. They have purchased an abandoned Methodist church building and he said that each Sunday he waits to see who will attend and what they will be wearing. He said he's even attended dressed in overalls to let the people know it's not what's on the outside that's important. His last sermon series was on refusing to judge the world around us, just to LOVE. I truly believe his heart matches Jesus' heart. People are drawn to Jesus.

As Shorty shared his story, Chris and I were captivated. I can't share everything he told us, but this part tells enough. According to Shorty, one Saturday night he was invited to a cookout and country singing. Of course, he said that most of the group was getting drunk, but he said he stayed anyway. He realized that some of the group didn't have tables at which to eat, so he said if someone would help him, he would get tables from his church. One of the men volunteered to go with him. Shorty said the man asked how he had keys to a church, to which Shorty replied, "I am the pastor." The man remarked, "If I ever went to a church, the ceiling would cave in!" When Shorty and his new friend arrived at the church, and the man got out with beer in hand. Shorty said that he turned around because the man had paused outside the door. He asked Shorty, "Aren't you going to tell me to leave this longneck outside?" Pastor Shorty replied, "That's between you and God." Needless to say, the man left his drink on the steps. This man and his family are the most recent new members at Cross Timber Cowboy Church. Shorty finished this account by adding, "His wife and kids are believers and strong, but God's Spirit will fix the man soon."

We must learn the lesson of allowing the Holy Spirit to convict. Our job is simply to love. We must reach out to the world around us, not hiding behind a tract or telling them to meet our pastor. Get to know people, connect to them and love them! Be to others what Jesus has been to you. On Sunday, we should gather and worship Jesus together as His body of believers. On Monday, we should head back to the world ready to love without judgement.

And Jesus said to her, "Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more." John 8:11 (NKJV)

11 And when the Pharisees saw it, they said to His disciples, "Why does your Teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?" 12 When Jesus heard that, He said to them, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 "But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy and not sacrifice.' Matt 9:11-13

Monday Munchies

2009-03-30T22:29:00.002+02:00

Okay, folks, here it is. Many blogs I read have a day of the week that they feature the same type of thing each week. Not me Mondays, Wordless Wednesday, Fashion Friday...so I have come up with Monday Munchies, where I share a recipe that I frankly think is fantastic. It might be microwave-warm-up easy or a little more difficult, but always "Haley proof" and tried on my poor family who occasionally eats some pretty crappy dinners because I "thought the recipe looked kinda good".

Here is the first edition of Monday Munchies:

Pork Chops with Black Beans and Salsa

4 boneless thin cut pork chops (they need to be the little ones, otherwise it takes FOREVER to cook them
1 Can of black beans
1 cup of salsa

Seriously folks, that's it.

Brown the pork chops in a skillet with a touch of olive oil (or for you Rachael Ray fans, EVOO). Add the can of beans and the salsa and simmer until beans and salsa are warm.

Seriously, thats it...nothing more. Just that.

I ALWAYS at least double this recipe. Unless you are feeding a family of squirrels, it just doesn't make enough.

Serve it with spanish rice, or steamed veggies. This is incredibly low fat and good for you. But you don't have to tell your family that!

This is a standby for me. I always have the pork chops on hand and ready to thaw. Salsa is a staple like flour, salt and pepper in my house and I make sure I always have black beans. Dinner is done in 15 minutes...take that Rachael Ray!!!

Where is a Catholic priest when you need one??

2009-03-30T06:45:00.002+02:00

My business with Gwen is beginning to take off. We have a couple of orders pending and are expecting more in the next couple of weeks. With this taking off and our lives as busy as always, we're finding that working our schedules so we can actually work together is sometimes difficult. So we sometimes bring work home with us and do it when we can squeeze it in, like nap time. I am finding that I am using my sewing machine almost daily. Now, if you've been reading my blog, you might remember when I said that my sewing machine might need an exorcism....well folks, I think we're to that point. In the last week I have broken two needles and managed to sew feet of stitches before realizing my machine had come unthreaded. This may not sound like a big deal...but oh it is sooooooooo frustrating. I belly ache about the "stupid piece of crap sewing machine" daily and have the urge to throw it out the back door at least once every other day. I have already asked for my Christmas present...you guessed it...a new sewing machine. A fancy one. That doesn't come unthreaded. But seeing as how December is still a really long way off, I'm gonna need to find a faster solution to the possessed sewing machine...does anyone know a Catholic priest I can borrow...I can't promise the sewing machine won't attack him...just that the sewing machine won't vomit green stuff or have a spinning head...oh, and he'll need to bring a nun who can sew...so she can varify my story about the possessed sewing machine...someone will need to understand that its behavior is not normal, nor of this world.

In other news...
Stay tuned tomorrow for my big Monday surprise.

Yummy yummy for my tummy

2009-03-26T19:36:00.002+01:00

Okay, so I love to cook, but what I really love is discovering something yummy that is super easy to do and easy on the wallet. The following recipe was in my Protestant Women of the Chapel (army wife Bible study group) monthly newsletter in February. It came highly recommended from another mother who also digs the easy.

4 chicken breasts (when I first made this, I only had chicken thighs...they work too)
1 cup of salsa (we like it hot at the Hawthorne house, I just dumped in a bunch of Pace)
1 package of taco seasoning (yeah, didn't have that either, used fajita seasoning...yummy)
1 can of cream of mushroom (everyone be shocked...I actually had this ingredient)
1/2 cup sour cream (forgot this the first time...still good)

Put the chicken in a crock pot and cover in taco seasoning. Add salsa and soup. Cook on high for 4-6 hours. 10 minutes before serving, stir in sour cream. Serve over rice. (I prefer serving with tortillas...again...yummy)

Can you tell this recipe is almost screw-up proof??

The hubby seriously digs this. Even the kids like it. I am currently making a double batch for a pot luck for my hubby at work. Can't you tell I'm slaving away...blogging???

If you don't have time to wait 4-6 hours, this can be done in a dutch oven...warning...check your chicken to make sure it doesn't stick. I let it cook about 1.5 hours and it was done. Left it on longer and it was still yummy.

I am reminded...

2009-03-25T20:35:00.003+01:00

With so much going on around us, I am sometimes amazed that God shows Himself in the way he does. The man from Bonham, TX, the mom from the northern mid-West with the faith of Moses even with a very sick 4-month-old(see Keeping Up With the Kovics to find a link to read her story), the story that my Bible study leader shared with us where she was inspired when she visited a church and watched 12 or more people be baptized into God's kingdom (there were enough that she lost count and had to guess). The list of things that show God to us is unlimited if we will just open our eyes. With all these things, I am reminded.

I am reminded:

-that my children are not my own...they are on loan from their Father in Heaven. He was kind enough to entrust them to my care for as long as He sees fit.

-that even when the world seems dark and gloomy--beyond hope even--that God is STILL in total control.

-that when a situation seems hopeless...where there is God, there is ALWAYS hope.

-that God works in EVERY situation, even if we don't quite get how.

-that I, in my limited knowledge and capability for understanding, will never, never truly comprehend God's reasons or His plan.

-that I was fortunate enough to really get to marry my best friend. If all the world would turn against me, I will still have him and God on my side.

-that I should pray more often for my friends...that they see God around them like I have...in the good and the bad.

2009-02-17T14:27:00.002+01:00

As this is my very first blog post, I guess I should set some kind of pattern for this thing. I mostly did it as a way for friends and family to keep up with me (or really my kids) as the military sends us around the world (we hope). My children have tendencies to do hysterical things and I often forget who I've told and who I haven't. This way, everyone gets the story. I don't have long and because I'm the mom of 3.5 kids my posts will probably usually be short. I'll post my next blog soon...maybe.